Entertainment

6 Things Beyonce's '7/11 Should Have Been About

by Caitlyn Callegari

Not to question Beyonce's omnipotence when it comes to anything regarding music or creativity or well, life. But, I must assert that if you're going to write a song with the same name as one of the greatest convenience stores in the history of America, you gotta do the store and all of the happiness it brings its due justice. Not that Beyonce's new song "7/11" isn't fantastic in all of its badassery, but it's just not the late night drunken munchie ode I was expecting it to be. Is it okay that I'm just a tad bit disappointed even after she posted her own little music video on her Instagram?

Before you come at me with your torches and pitchforks for my Beyonce blasphemy though, I urge you to think about all of the times 7-Eleven saved you when you were tired, drunk, broke, and so, so hungry. Or, during a particularly hot summer day when all you wanted was a bucket of ice water mixed with sugar and there was the slurpee in various flavors, ready for the taking. I mean, Beyonce knows the value of a slurpee judging by one of her latest Instagram pics. Maybe she's feeling guilty for leaving it out? So, here's what I think "7/11" should have really been about.

TWOFER TAQUITOS

Delicious and double the calories and carbs. Just what you're looking for at 3am.

THE SLURPEE

I believe it was Benny Benassi who said, "You are my cinema. I could watch you forever."

PIZZA AT LITERALLY ALMOST ANY TIME OF DAY

And when you have approximately two pennies to rub together, it really hits the spot.

THE HOT COFFEE

Who brews this??? Angels?

THE ICED COFFEE

Because hot coffee and iced coffee are two vastly different, equally delicious species and they are both done oh so right.

THE BIG GULP

Because maybe between the time you fill up your cup and you get to your destination, all the soda in the world will dry up and you now have an endless resource of the good stuff.

Images: jparx/Tumblr; Giphy (5)