Penis-Shaped Lipstick is a Thing Now

by Hayli Goode

Long gone are the days of traditional, teardrop lipstick silhouettes. Our options now range from cats to penis shaped lipsticks (officially called Lipsdick, naturally) or other interesting silhouettes. Thank goodness for all the creative types out there.

When I caught my first glimpse of the Lipsdick, it took me a beat to really make out what invaded my computer screen. "What an interesting, smooth tip these lipsticks have," I thought to myself. Then I looked harder and gasped a little. Then gasped more when I found out friends were giving friends Lipsdick as Christmas presents! And a note to my friends who are now thinking of giving me a Lipsdick out of cruel humor, you would no longer be my friend. Unless it was the perfect shade of red I've been seeking.

I think the thing that got me with the Lipsdick was that it was very detailed. Also unlike traditional lipsticks, Lipsdick aren't named for each shade. Apparently, the crude humor has to stop somewhere.

I'm not sure of a better way to spruce up life then to choose a lipstick shaped like something other than that teardrop that's been around since the 1910s. It's outdone its time. Instead, I've listed five other alternatives to the traditional tear lipstick below — and no, not all of them are NSFW

1. Penises

Do you see what I mean? Detailed. Too much.

2. Hearts

These Holika Holika heartful moisture lipsticks are almost too cute for me to handle. Almost. Plus, if they're already in the shape of a heart, then it surely can't be too hard to achieve the Cupid's bow lip I've been working on for months.

3. Stars

Because Ann Sui is everything whimsical. These would definitely start a conversation on the subway (especially that camo one!) My only concern is that they may not go on comfortable or evenly. For a designer's lipstick though, at $30 they're pretty affordable if you need to splurge for a special event.

4. Cats (!!!)

I am so thankful for Paul & Joe for this lipstick. Not only do I enjoy it, but it served as great gifts for about 20 of my friends — not that anyone could bare to wear down the adorable carving.

5. Sculpted

Wahahafactory sculpts lipstick into whatever you like! If they don't have a shape you already love on their Etsy shop, you can contact them directly and ask them to sculpt a tube of lipstick into whatever creation you desire. It's a little pricey, but definitely worth it. I mean, look at Lady Gaga! Spot on.

Images: Amazon; Holika Holia; Beautylish; Urban Outfitters; Etsy/Wahahafactory