Should I Text Him (or Her)? This Flowchart Will Walk You Through the Harrowing Process of Deciding
We've all been there: You have someone's number... you really dig the person it belongs to... but should you actually text them? It can be a mildly terrifying prospect, texting the person you like; luckily, though, this flowchart created by graphic designer Becca Clason can help you navigate the tricky waters of whether or not you should go ahead and hit send. Who doesn't love a good flowchart?
Wrote Clason about the chart, "I got married in 2011, but I've had my fair share of boy troubles and over analyzing. While I'm certainly no expert, I've learned a lot from my mistakes in love. Hopefully these tips will be helpful for others who are trying to navigate relationships." Oh, and just because the example used is whether or not you should text a dude, there's no reason why it couldn't apply for pretty much everyone — men, women, whatever.
It's probably worth noting that most of the paths through which the chart leads end in "Don't do it." I don't think it's meant as a scare tactic, though; mostly it's a lesson in texting etiquette. For example, situations in which it's advised that you back off the "send" button include:
- He's your ex and you didn't part on good terms;
- He's your ex and he's dating someone new;
- You've never spoken to him before (and if that's the case, why do you have his number in the first place?);
- And you've already texted him a whole bunch of other times today (no one likes to be text-bombed).
Makes sense, right? Yeah, I thought so, too, for the most part.
However, I'm also not sure I agree with all of the "Do not text!" situations. Texting him when you get home after you just went out together, for instance, is listed as a no-no, but as long as you keep it short, sweet, and positive — "I had a great time tonight; thanks for the terrific night out!" or something — I don't see the harm in it. I've never been a big believer in the "three day rule" for anyone, guys or gals; if you had a fun time with someone, why not let be upfront and let them know?
But, as Clason noted, she's not claiming to be an expert or anything; she built the flowchart based off of her own experiences, so maybe the biggest takeaway from it is just to exercise your judgment. It's usually best to stop and think for a moment before you hit "send," anyway, no matter who's on the receiving end.
Check out the flowchart below, and head on over to Becca Clason's website to see more of her work: