When Guys Hit On Girls (On Mushrooms)

Simple Pickup is an online collection of videos offering men tips for ensnaring women's attention in a way that makes them feel it was their idea. It's a little...uncomfortable, for the most part. It's unclear if Kong and Jesse, the young guys behind the series, are serious or joking or some mixture of the two. Regardless, to celebrate reaching 2 million YouTube subscribers, the duo dropped a special treat for the masses: A video of them approaching women on the street while tripping their faces off on mushrooms.

I'll admit: These dudes seem to actually have at least a little skill when it comes to talking to women. They seem, more or less, like approachable, charming, non-predatory guys who are more interested in helping dudes figure out how to actually speak to women as opposed to targeting them. They offer legit insight into the whirlwind, mostly horrible world of Tinder. And — somehow — they even disprove the nasty rumor that cheesy pick-up lines aren't also wildly affective. Fine, they're not entirely the worst.

When the two up the ante and attempt to get girls' phone numbers post-magic mushroom munching on the crowded streets of Amsterdam, hilarity obviously ensues. They struggle to hold focus, often forgetting altogether to talk with passersby at all, instead becoming questionably infatuated with important things like trash cans. "Why are there nipples on this trashcan?" Kong wonders. Good question, Kong! It's a good question. *pats head*

At one point, Kong demands a kiss and makes the accompanying sounds in case clarification was needed. Offensive? Endearing? Mostly just further evidence that people on drugs are annoying as hell? Whatever it is, the total phone number count at the experiment's conclusion speaks for itself.

Image: YouTube