Life

Her Secret To A Long Life Is Hilarious

by Doyin Oyeniyi

Do you want to live a long and happy life? Just follow the advice of 109-year-old Jessie Gallan and avoid men! #YesAllMen. According to the Daily Mail, Gallen was born on a cottage farm, where she grew up with her five sisters and one brother, until she left the farm at 13 to become a milkmaid. She then went on to work as a kitchen helper in a hotel that’s served the Queen during her time there. Now Gallan currently resides at a nursing home in Aberdeen, where she celebrated her 109th birthday on January 2. In all her years, Gallan has never been married.

“My secret to a long life has been staying away from men," she told the Mail. "They're just more trouble than they're worth.”

I’ve always suspected this, but now that I’ve heard it from Gallan, Scotland’s oldest woman, I have to believe it. Men can be stress-inducing creatures, so it makes perfect sense that avoiding them would prolong your life — though it actually goes against scientific evidence that marriage IMPROVES health and longevity. Perhaps the ultimate secret is to marry a woman rather than a man.

Gallan admits that her life has been full of ups and downs and maybe she might have a few regrets, but I don't think not getting married is one of them. Gallan also mentioned that she gets plenty of exercise and eats a bowl of porridge every morning. I guess we will never know which of her behaviors most influenced her longevity.

Watch Gallan talk a bit more about her life with STV News.

Image: Screengrab/STV News Youtube