Life
9 Questions To Ask Before Moving In Together
If you’re looking to take the next step with your S.O., perhaps you should take this quiz from Rent.com — a business with monetary stakes in your decision — to help you decide. The “9 Questions to Ask Before Moving in Together” test reportedly has had over 15,000 participants, 80 percent of whom have “discovered they are in fact ready to take the plunge.” I’d be willing to bet that 80 percent of those “entries” should reconsider gambling life decisions on internet quizzes, so I took the quiz myself to find out.
I’m not currently in coupled, so I based my responses on the dynamic of my last relationship. The questions ranged from seemingly banal (“Have you ever used the bathroom in front of your S.O.?”) to personal and irrelevant (“How many times per week do you and your partner get physical?”). Some of the responses were reasonable, but keep in mind that this quiz is multiple choice for ease and accessibility. When asked “You love spending every weekend at your partner's place, and love it even more when s/he stays with you,” the obvious answer would be yes for couples considering moving in together. I answered the quiz with both “Yes” and “No” respectively, and this was ultimately the question that most skewed the test results (for obvious reasons).
Question three asked, “After your partner cooks you a delicious dinner, you always offer to clean up?” To which you should respond yes, every time, or you’re a jerk. If you do not, feel free to reassess your relationship dynamic as well as your understanding of common courtesy.
“After a fight with your S.O., [you…]” pried question six, to which I answered “both take time to cool off and talk about it the next day.” This is something that becomes difficult to do when you’re already living with someone, but it works fine if you’ve got (cough, cough) your own living arrangements.
Question seven: “What is your favorite thing to do with your partner?” I answered “Party.” Besides hiking, it was the only thing on this list that felt remotely engaging. And as we all know, excessive partying is the cornerstone to any healthy relationship.
The second to last question was, “You want to marry your significant other…” I answered “You don’t want to get married, to anyone, ever.” (This is actually true.) I actually find this irrelevant, and I don’t think marriage must be the ultimate goal in moving in together. If you’re ready to make that step, sharing a space could serve as a useful trail run, but those two decisions can be mutually exclusive, as well. (Also: Man in the leftmost quandrant appears to have more than bad behaviors to work on.)
Based on my responses, which were pragmatic and not necessarily skewed either way, my results returned the above response. However you can retake the quiz, because of course you can.
Living with a partner is not a decision that should be made out of convenience. Cherish your independence. Definitely consider how cool it is to sleep in your own entire bed, a bed you can share when it suits you. Sharing close quarters with someone is hard, a fact often overlooked in throes of budding romance. Talk to your friends and family. Read this list. Consider the financial implications. No one knows better than you when it’s time to make the jump, but carefully weigh the cons beforehand (the pros are plentiful, it’s the bad stuff you need to consider). And if the quiz says you are ready to move in? Well, lucky for you, they have some apartment listings you should look at.
The takeaway: Don’t base a major life decision on an Internet quiz.
Image: Viacheslav Iakobchuk/Fotolia