41 Awesome Euphemisms For Vagina Around The World, Because Your Pupusa Speaks All Languages

Pussy, beaver, moo-moo, lady garden: the English language has many euphemisms for the word "vagina," most of them frankly a bit ridiculous. (Think of as many as you can in thirty seconds. Go! I'll wait.) But we don't have the monopoly on charming slang terms for a cisgender lady's intimate parts. Languages around the world have developed their own shorthand to avoid actually naming vaginas directly, whether from religious or cultural squeamishness, a wish to play it cute, or just a kind of metaphorical accuracy (why, yes, it does look a bit like a clam or a mussel).

This list is just the tip of the iceberg — every region seems to have its own particular phrases, and it likely differs from town to town — but if you want to join in a wink-wink nudge-nudge conversation in a language other than English, this is going to be your guide. The main themes? Animals and food. Whether we're just not very imaginative or vaginas are just very metaphorically obvious, people looking for a nice slang term tend to reach for their larders or their local zoos to get inspiration.

Some languages, on the surface at least, pretty much call a spade a spade: a pussy's a pussy in Arabic (kus), Italian (figa) and Cantonese (hai, a term banned on television which literally means "a hole in the bottom of the body"). Is this directness better? Maybe for clarity — but going without these euphemisms would certainly deprive us of a lot of laughs.

So without further ado...

1. Alcancía

ORIGIN: Venezuela.

DEFINITION: Piggy bank.

2. Araña

ORIGIN: Panama.

DEFINITION: Spider. (I have no idea why.)

3. Arepa

ORIGIN: Colombia.

DEFINITION: A local maize-based flatbread filled with delicious meat.

4. Argolla

ORIGIN: Argentina.

DEFINITION: Ring.

5. Bicho

ORIGIN: Nicaragua.

DEFINITION: Bug, brat or pest.

6. Cachucha

ORIGIN: Mexico.

DEFINITION: A kind of dance that's a little like a bolero.

7. Cajeta

ORIGIN: South America

DEFINITION: Fudge.

8. Champa

ORIGIN: Peru.

DEFINITION: Tent or turf. "Pitching a tent" is apparently a female thing in Peru.

9. Chango

ORIGIN: Mexico.

DEFINITION: Monkey.

10. Cipka

ORIGIN: Poland.

DEFINITION: A baby chicken or chick.

11. Concha

ORIGIN: Mexico.

DEFINITION: A sea-shell usually associated with pilgrims, or shell-shaped bread known as concha blanca.

12. Conejo

ORIGIN: Spain.

DEFINITION: Rabbit.

13. Cotorra

ORIGIN: Uruguay.

DEFINITION: Parrot or loudmouth. Uruguay appreciates vocal vaginas, it seems.

14. Cuchara

ORIGIN: Guatemala.

DEFINITION: Spoon.

15. Doos

ORIGIN: The Netherlands.

DEFINITION: Box. Straight to the point, the Dutch.

16. Gallo

ORIGIN: Colombia.

DEFINITION: Rooster.

17. Guayabo

ORIGIN: Mexico.

DEFINITION: Guava fruit (or a hangover).

18. Katori

Taylor Weidman/Getty Images News/Getty Images

ORIGIN: India.

DEFINITION: A bowl or small cup.

19. Koneko-chan

ORIGIN: Japan.

DEFINITION: Kitten. Cats are slang for vagina in several languages around the world.

20. Higo

ORIGIN: Spain.

DEFINITION: Fig.

21. Manju

ORIGIN: Japan.

DEFINITION: Bean paste bun. The correct rude slang is ke manju, which means "hairy bean paste bun." Charming.

22. Meiki

ORIGIN: Japan.

DEFINITION: Box.

23. Mico

ORIGIN: El Salvador.

DEFINITION: A type of South American black-tailed marmoset.

24. Minet

ORIGIN: France.

DEFINITION: Small cat.

25. Moule

ORIGIN: France.

DEFINITION: Mussel.

26. Mus

ORIGIN: Sweden

DEFINITION: A mouse.

27. Musume

ORIGIN: Japan.

DEFINITION: Daughter. (I know. It's odd.)

28. Oku no in

ORIGIN: Japan.

DEFINITION: Inner sanctum.

29. Papa

ORIGIN: Spain.

DEFINITION: Slang for a double chin.

30. Papaya

ORIGIN: Cuba.

DEFINITION: They call papaya "fruta bomba." Several varieties of Spanish use papayas or similar fruits as euphemisms for vaginas, which once famously got Mitt Romney (and his love for papaya) in trouble.

31. Pepita

ORIGIN: Mexico.

DEFINITION: Seed or nugget.

32. Pizza

ORIGIN: Serbia.

DEFINITION: Exactly what it sounds like.

33. Pupusa

ORIGIN: El Salvador.

DEFINITION: A Salvadorian culinary specialty, a tortilla filled with cheese.

34. Sapo

ORIGIN: Chile.

DEFINITION: Toad.

35. Schnäggli

ORIGIN: Switzerland.

DEFINITION: Snail.

36. Schwöbli

ORIGIN: Switzerland.

DEFINITION: A bun that highly resembles a bum.

37. Tako

ORIGIN: Japan.

DEFINITION: Octopus.

38. Táohuāyuán

ORIGIN: Mandarin Chinese.

DEFINITION: Garden of peach blossoms. Definitely my favorite.

39. Tanima no yuri

ORIGIN: Japan.

DEFINITION: Lily of the valley.

40. Tostón

ORIGIN: Puerto Rico.

DEFINITION: Roast suckling pig.

41. Utsuk

ORIGIN: Greenland.

DEFINITION: An obscure species of seal. No, really.

Images: Wikimedia Commons, Giphy, Table Talk At Larry's