National Grammar Day Means You Can Finally Call Out Everyone You Know On Their Improper Use Of "Your"
Strict about the proper use of "you're" and "your" in text messages (and really, we have keyboards now, so you can't blame T9 shortcuts)? Whisper under your breath when someone uses "less" when they really mean "fewer"? Feel like you are constantly screaming seeing signs with misplaced or completely unnecessary apostrophes ("Fresh Veggie's!")? March 4 is your Christmas Day. National Grammar Day is when grammar and English language snobs unite to show why proper grammar matters. And yes, discipline those who flagrantly get the rules wrong.
National Grammar Day began back in 2008 by the Society for the Promotion of Good Grammar — you know, the coolest society in the land. It's not a bank holiday, so you do have to go to work (sorry), but that just gives you more opportunity to encounter and then correct your biggest grammar pet peeves. (It's "it's" vs. "its," isn't it?)
But hey, we grammar nerds know how to have a little fun, too. We aren't too busy with our noses stuck in the style guide our our worn-out copy of Eats Shoots and Leaves to poke a little fun at ourselves and others. In fact, many people took to Twitter to share their best grammar jokes, and I found the greatest ones so you don't have to.
I don't understand what's funny here, because this is just the straightforward "Pin the Apostrophe on Its" game all my English major friends and I play at parties.
Well, this is just unfortunate. On today of all days.
Best (Dorkiest). Cake. Ever. I'm full of jealousy.
My absolute favorite one in this set is "Every time you make a typo, the errorists win." Close second goes to "The past, the present, and the future walk into a bar. It was tense."
Unpopular opinion alert: I love a good semicolon.
Oh my gosh, yes.
I guarantee if you use this knock knock joke on anyone, they will immediately hate you. But it's so worth it.
Don't be this guy. Just be like the rest of us and think all your corrections in your head. Except for "literally"; no human can let that slide.
Wait, it's not acanteloupe? Isn't it like opossum?
I'm flabbergasted that I have not yet heard this one.
I'm personally more on the side of "May the AP Style Guide" be with you, but to each her own.
Give this mug to every coffee-swilling writer you know. Which should be every writer you know.
This is really and truly painful.
I swear, just try to get this song out of your head for the rest of the day. You're welcome.