The 11 Emotional Stages Of Daylight Saving Time Finally Being Upon Us
Call me crazy, but since the temperature first dropped below the 50s late last year, almost every morning, I have woken up to the frightful prospect of never feeling the warmth of the sun on my bare skin ever again. It has been a particularly atrocious winter, what with the seemingly relentless number of storms in the East (poor, poor Boston) and the startling snowfalls in normally flurry-free parts of the country. But the first sign of winter's demise is finally — finally! — upon us, with this Sunday's Daylight Saving Time at 2 a.m. And when we spring (pun intended) out of bed come Sunday morning — or afternoon, you're not a robot — we will rub the frosty sleep from our eyes and begin to live like real human beings again.
Daylight Saving Time is both awesome for what it represents and awful because of the fact that you will lose an entire hour of sleep as your digital clock automatically sets itself 60 minutes forward, not to mention the slight overall disorientation as your body adjusts to darker mornings and brighter evenings. The whole concept itself isn't quite steeped in logic, having been conceived in a time before the widespread use of electricity and when the workforce was largely comprised of farmers.
But however you look at it, prepare to endure a whole host of conflicting and confusing emotions in the hours before, during, and after Daylight Saving Time.
1. Blind oblivion
Okay, so maybe Friday night's shenanigans have left you mentally and physically drained, so you go about your Saturday drinking cup after cup of black coffee, completely clueless as to the blessing/curse that will hit humanity in mere hours.
2. Dawning realization
But then your roommate/mother/boyfriend/girlfriend calls you and goes, "Dude, don't forget to switch your cuckoo clock [because in this scenario you have a cuckoo clock] an hour forward tonight," leading you to stare at him/her/them with hollow eyes that slowly start to fill with color and life as you realize what it means.
3. The moment it truly hits you
You're shocked. Overwhelmed. Trying to understand how it completely flew over your head — until now.
4. Unadulterated, over-the-top excitement
Obviously the only way to respond to such news is to scream into the face of the person who delivered it.
5. An infectious burst of emotion
Your excitement bubbles over and gets everyone else who previously felt nothing for Daylight Saving Time — those chartalans! — in an equally ecstatic mood.
What did you expect? It's winter. All that screaming was the only exercise I've had for months. I need to lie down.
7. Party mode
So you've had your 15 minutes of panting in bed and ample time to slap some foundation on your face in preparation for the night. Now it's time to usher in Daylight Saving with a disgusting Fireball shot — or 10, because why not?
"It's midnight," you slur, waving your wine glass in the air (yes, you've moved on to wine now), "Daylight Saving, where are you??"
9. Deep (and hopefully your last) hibernation
All partied out, you couldn't even stay up to watch the clock on your iPhone magically jump an hour ahead.
Are you alive? Check. Is it morning? Check. Did Daylight Saving Time happen already? Check! Did you lose an hour of sleep? Check... But it's Sunday — does it matter?
Post-coffee; a splitting headache — everything remains the same. Spring, welcome.
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