Entertainment

This 'Guardians Of the Galaxy' Parody's Unexpected

by Nick Romano

Guardians of the Galaxy proved a few things: First, that Chris Pratt is incredible, second, a talking tree can be lovable and third, Marvel can transform even the most obscure set of superheroes into international sensations. But what truly defines success is whether it's popular enough to achieve porn-parody fame. And whaddya know — a Guardians Of The Galaxy porn parody exists. Popularity: Achieved.

The first look at the GoTG porn parody comes from io9, and, almost needless to say, it looks just as ridiculous as it sounds. It seemed like a stretch at the time for Marvel to make a foulmouthed, gunslinging raccoon likable — but how could it possibly be (dare I say it?) sexy enough to be in a porno? Maybe a Skinnemax after-dark version, but a full-on porn parody?

Just as director James Gunn did the impossible with one of the most popular movies of 2014, Lee Roy Myers is doing the same with — wait for it — Gnardians of the Galaxy. Hey, if there's anyone more fit to pull off this feat, it's the guy who brought us such classics as The Humper Games, Game of Bones and Doctor Whore. (FYI, I did not make those names up. They are, in fact, real porn parodies.) Take your first kinda NSFW look below.

If you think these new Guardians are hilarious, check out their names: (from left to right) Gamwhora, Star Load, Rocket Raccooch, Crax and Groin. Not shown are Kokrath (presumably a spoof on Djimon Honsou's Korath) and Bonin (a take on Lee Pace's Ronin). Aside from adult film star April O'Neil tucked into that Raccooch costume, the obvious standout is Groin. I suppose his new look makes sense: He's made of wood, now he's a woody. Get it?! (But don't men typically not appreciate having others fall over in fits of laughter at the sight of their Johnsons?) I also wonder if he's a man of few word, just like in the original movie... "I am Groin."

Gnardians of the Galaxy will be released for free on WoodRocket.com on April 3. And for all you fanatics who appreciate extended takes, bloopers and deleted scenes, an extended version will be released on DVD later that month.

Image: Woodrocket.com