8 OkCupid Tips To Get You Better Dates, Because If You're Not Logged In On Sunday Nights, You're Missing Everything
These days, online dating is more popular than ever. We're tired of the club and bar scene and hope that sites like OkCupid can present us with our best options. But are we putting our ideal self forward — and getting the best matches we can online? Much like in life and in love, there's absolutely some simple steps we can take to get better results on OkCupid.
Actually, a lot of what will work in "in real life" will work online. We know that great photos and a killer opening will help. We want to share positive aspects of ourselves, not try too hard (no need to end every sentence looking for the giggle), and we want to intrigue them enough that they come back for more. We want to reach the careful balance between being flirty and not being too forward. All that goes with the territory.
But, the skills required to get that person's attention while out at the local bar is a bit different than what we may do on OkCupid (considering there's millions of active users on the site), and for that, we consulted some experts for their simple profile, message and timing tricks to getting better results.
1. Tech out with the Chrome plugin
Technology brought us online dating, it can also help us to best use it. Using the Chrome Plugin called "OkCupid (for the Non Mainstream User) can be a great asset, suggests John Boese, Co-Founder of GoFindFriends.com, a site for making new friends, which works similar to a dating site. This plugin allows you to sort through photos and user's answers to specific questions much more quickly.
2. Make small changes to your profile daily
Update your profile by adding or deleting one word each day. “The site promotes profiles that have changed, even for small changes. You'll get significantly more people viewing your profile this way,” says Boese.
3. Share yourself
Make sure to include keywords in your profile for things that are important to you; anything from being vegetarian to soccer to your favorite new TV show, suggests writer/comedian Lynn Bixenspan, co-host of Relationshit, a storytelling and therapy show. Don't be afraid to put out there the things that are important to you.
For example: Do you know for sure you want kids/absolutely don't? It's OK to put that on there so you don't waste your time getting to know people who will be ultimately incompatible.
4. Copy and paste
“OkCupid founder, Christian Rudder revealed some very interesting findings in his book, Dataclysm: Who We Are When We Think No One’s Looking. One piece of advice is that you must cast a wide net to catch the most fish,” says Steven Ward, founder CEO of Love Lab, a mobile dating app that ranks people based on their level of trust. He [Rudder] points out that copying and pasting messages is the most efficient way to initiate communication on OkCupid.
In terms of messages composed as a proportion of those replied he found that its much less time consuming to copy and paste and about 75 percent as effective as sending an original message. He states, "in terms of effort-in to results-out (copying and pasting) always wins: measuring by replies received per unit effort, it’s many times more efficient to just send everyone roughly the same thing than to compose a new message each time,’ “ says Ward.
5. Timing is everything
Always, always, always be logged in on Sunday evening. Just leave your computer logged in to the site from 7 p.m. to midnight because this is when they have the most people on the site, says Boese. Being currently logged in gets you more views and other users are more likely to write you. It seems as if half the activity on the site occurs in this Sunday evening timeframe, says Boese.
6. Give information to get information
“If there is something you want to know about someone, volunteer that information about yourself. “I love living in the city. Quaint restaurants, intimate coffee shops, tiny bars filled with character all really appeal to me. How about you? What do you like most about the city,” says Ward.
7. Play games
But not in that way. Add a fun question or a little game in your profile, says Boese. People like solving problems and they'll be more likely to write you. The best is playing "two truths and a lie." In your profile, write that two of the three following statements about you are true and one is a lie. Ask them to guess which one is the lie.
8. Take charge and meet ASAP
If you’re ready to go offline and you want to meet in person, make a suggestion. Don’t be afraid to say what you’d like to do and when you’d like to do it. If they can’t accommodate you, ask for an alternative.
“The most important thing to do once you connect with someone online is to get offline ASAP. Studies have shown that the longer you wait to get together the greater the likelihood of disappointment when you meet due to wishful thinking, idealization and unrealistic expectations,” says Ward.
Images: dawolf-/Flickr; Giphy