If Lorelai Gilmore Had Instagram, It Would Look Just Like This — PHOTOS
Confession: despite heavily binge-watching the first few seasons of Gilmore Girls, I've been dragging my feet through Season 7, despite knowing how it ends, because I just don't want to see it all come to a conclusion. It just feels like Rory, Lorelai, and Luke are real people, you know? To that end, I am so curious about their future, and how they'd function on a world constantly online. What would happen to the Gilmore girls today, after they had long ditched their BlackBerries for iPhones?
I'm not 100 percent sure if Lorelai, who would be pushing 47 now, would be all that tech savvy. But then again, Lorelai isn't like a regular mom, she's a cool mom, and that makes me feel like she'd be down with basic social media. Like, maybe Tinder would be off her radar, but Twitter would be a big score to showcase her quick, of-the-moment observations. And as far as Instagram is concerned... well, I think she'd make the most of it.
So let's take a theoretical peek about what Lorelai would be up to in 2015, via the app we love most: Instagram. Here's just a few things you'd find in your newsfeed if you followed the caffeine-addicted chatterbox.
1. Constant Instagrams that show her undying devotion to coffee, including documenting her tri-daily coffee outings.
The weirdness with Luke is long gone, and Lorelai is visiting his diner on the regular for all her coffee needs. Rory's in town for the day, and they decide to have an old fashioned slumber party with a late-night rewatch of Pippi Longstocking. Realizing they're out of those heavenly beans-for-brewing, the Gilmores show up at Luke's at 3 a.m., banging on his door, pretending to be zombies with a craving for caffeine. Luke, disgruntled, ends up making the coffee.
And yes, then Lorelai makes him take a picture. Actually, 26 pictures. The first 25 turned out wonky.
2. Gushing about the gloriousness of Lorelai Jr.
Lorelai won't cop to the truth that Rory's Valedictorian speech had her bawling. Instead, she goes the snappier route: she's created a long running joke where Rory's accomplishments are overshadowed by a statement about how she burned something to the ground. The #mommyslittlearson tag is chock full of botched humble brags.
3. Precious pics of Paul Anka.
When Rory's not around and there's no coffee to photograph, Lorelai clouds everyone's Instagram feed with shots of Paul Anka. Yes, he's still alive and kicking. Yes, he's still exceptionally strange.
4. Talking smack about Emily whatever chance she gets.
Which is weird, because ever since Richard's death, Emily has been the ultimate Queen of I Don't Give A Damn. She's drinking, smoking, and is a total riot at DAR events. Friday dinners have been informally reinstated to out of quasi-concern to check up on her, but just in case, she always has a bunch of maids going through the rotating doors, keeping an eye on her.
I think what's important is that Lorelai has finally found a place to fit her mother into her life. On social media. Far, far, away.
Images: WB(1) Mary Grace Garis/WB (4)