8 Ways To Make Hooking Up In A Dorm Easier
It's funny how everyone says their wildest days were in college, and yet college makes it so difficult to be wild. Don't get us wrong: The desire and lack of inhibitions are there. But so are the limitations. How are we supposed to get it on when we're living in a tiny dorm room with a tinier bed? Even if we can get past the twin-sized bed with two adult-sized bodies, we often have at least one roommate not entirely so willing to give up their night's sleep so we can get frisky. It's all about learning to how to have sex in a small space.
As with sex in any other environment, the best results come with communication and good planning. Chances are your roomie is going to be in the same scenario sooner or later, so if you come to an agreement about mutual respect and consideration — tie on the door knob, anyone? — both of you can have a way better semester.
Less than ideal settings are no excuse to be reckless with safety or rude with your roommates — or your partner. Plan ahead and have fun. Who knows, the fear of getting caught or the sexiness of getting it on in confined spaces may add to the excitement!
1. Schedule Ahead
It can be a challenge to hook up when you’re concerned about your roommate(s) walking in and out at any time. "Having a conversation with your roommate(s) about sexy time with visitors is a good way to avoid unexpected and possibly unwelcome interruptions," says Dr. Laurie Bennett-Cook, a clinical sexologist.
2. Know The Positions That Work
If you have bunk beds stick with positions like spooning, missionary, or a low doggie. Anything requiring height (cowboy etc.) could get painful quickly, says Bennett-Cook.
3. Don't Limit Yourself To The Bed
If the positions required to making it work in a little bed doesn’t appeal to you then get creative. Make use of the desk, a chair or stand against the wall, suggests Bennett-Cook.
4. Turn The Volume Down
As tough as it can be, try and keep the noise to a minimum. It may be exciting to you that others can hear you, but is it exciting to your play partner(s) or to those who may be on the hearing end of things? Besides, it would really suck to lose the privilege of having a sexy guest over because somebody complains. Also, the answer is “no” your roommate is not sleeping.
"While having super sneaky, super quite, still sex can be extremely hot, just know that there is a very good chance the person in the bed next to you really does know what is going on," says Bennett-Cook.
5. Have A Code
Negotiate with your roommate. Scrunchies, socks, Do Not Disturb signs, whatever. Have a code both of you can use when you want privacy so you step on toes less, suggests Julian Wolf, wordsmith, educator, and performer.
6. Pay Attention To Dorm Patterns
"Most dorms have at least an hour or two where public spaces are virtually empty, just as there are louder hours where noises coming from your room are less likely to be heard," says Wolf.
7. Be Prepared
Keep some condoms and lube in a drawer in your dorm room. The moment things get hot and heavy is not when you want to ask, “did you bring protection?” to your partner. Each of us needs to be responsible for ourselves and our pleasurable experiences, reminds Bennett-Cook.
8. Communication Is Sexy
"Consent and communication are sexy. Together they lead to more sexy times as those involved are upfront about their wants, needs, desires and boundaries," says Bennett-Cook. These rules shouldn’t only apply to the partner(s) you plan on hooking up with but to those it indirectly affects, such as your roommate(s).
Images: Nataly A/Flickr; Giphy