Buying drink coasters is one of the stages of becoming an adult. You don't need coasters in college because everything from the floor to the walls is sketchily carpeted, and that Natty Ice can is probably going to leave a stain anyway. But when you find your first apartment and then buy a coffee table that you actually like—even if it was one of your great thrift store finds—you come to the realization that coasters are probably a thing you should own. Look no further, because we found coasters that will give you conversation topics for days: Stackable brain coasters are officially a thing, and you should probably own some because you're a hopeless nerd (and bless you for it).
If your first reaction is a three word phrase that start with "what" and ends with a 4-letter bad word we teach kids not to say, join the club. But once I actually starting reading about these, it's kind of awesome. Granted, I come from a family who played nerdy brainiac games and I can't help but think that 5-year-old me would've found these coasters intriguing. In fact, grown-up me is finding them pretty cool too.
The coasters were created by ThinkGeek, and the company would like to remind you that these exclusive brains are not microwave safe. It's a set of ten glass coasters and each has a slice of the human brain printed on it. Then you can stack these cerebral coasters up (they're labeled) and if you look from the right angle, you'll see a full human brain. Here's one coaster versus the whole stack:
Oh, casual. Just taking a look at our cerebral cortex while having a gin and tonic and not getting a ring on the coffee table. (See! That could be your life.)
Anyone want to take a guess as to what green substance is in that glass? It looks suspiciously like liquified lime green jello. Just saying.
One of the points of this product is to remind you that there are, according to Think Geek, "billions of neurons working like crazy so you exist." In keeping with this educational theme, as a means to drink without staining your table, here are a few facts about your brain that you maybe didn't know (or possibly do, but I'll tell you anyway because SCIENCE):
1. The brain has two hemispheres
The left is for analytical thoughts and right for creative thoughts. Men process primarily on the left whereas women tend to use both sides equally. So like... girls rule, boys drool?
2. Learning a second language before age 5 changes how your brain develops later in life
So if you went to a bilingual elementary school, congratulations, you win.
3. Your brain keeps developing until your late 40s
And then you while away the hours, conferin' with the flowers, consultin' with the rain. (Kidding, then you help your kids or other youths develop their brains, because you're basically a genius.)
4. Your brain uses 20% of the total oxygen and blood in your body
Just in case you didn't think it was important enough already, the brain likes to make it known that it lays claim to 20% of your resources.
5. There really is a virus that attacks human DNA and makes people less smart and hinders your ability to learn and remember
It's legitimately called the "Stupidity Virus." Michel is pretty sure everyone he's every met suffers from said virus.
6. Your brain releases a high amount of dopamine when you have an orgasm
A brain scan of someone who's just orgasmed resembles a brain scan of someone on heroine.
Images: Think Geek(3), Giphy(4)
