Dear internet: Allow me to introduce you to Marnie the Dog on Instagram. She's everything you've been looking for and then some. Sort of like Marnie on Girls, except nicer. Not only is Marnie the most adorable shih tzu you've ever seen, but she was adopted later in life, raising awareness by reminding us that senior dogs need to be adopted too! For all of those who want a dog (NOW), but worry that they don't have the time, adopting an older dog is a great solution. Puppies need the time to be taken to classes, potty trained, etc. If you adopt an older dog, more often than not, they've had some training. And they are waiting in the shelters, in need of your love.
In the meantime, can we please assess the emotional turmoil Marnie's cuteness is putting us through? I can roughly narrate all of the thoughts that will go through your head as you scroll through her pics: "I absolutely need a dog right now. Today. Within the next HOUR. And then I'm going to make my dog an Instagram account because it will be sensationally adorable, and catapult us into Internet STARDOM."
Alas, there will come a time when all of us are ready for a dog and the burden of doggie fame. But in the meantime, we have to face the facts: Dogs are expensive, they're time-consuming and they are a commitment. Plus, Instagram is a lot of work. If you think you're ready for the plunge, though, I can't encourage you enough to adopt—if you're lucky, you'll end up with a dog like this:
If you find a dog that can help you make matzo brei, mazel tov.
A dog you can have pajama parties with.
A pup that understands when you've had a long day.
A dog that loves you like you love frozen waffles...and almond milk?
Maybe even a pupperz who chills with Larry King, and gives his own #itsmytwocents.
Okay, stop. How is this even fair?
If Marnie met Usher and they didn't do a duet of "U Remind Me" then all's just not right with the world.
And yes, now seems like as good a time as any to recreate that moment, because it probably happened.
That song came out before Marnie was born. No, really. Marnie's 12, but "U Remind Me" came out in 2001. Doesn't that make you feel old?
If you're actually interested in adopting a dog, there are resources a-plenty helping you, me and the rest of the working world get our own real life Marnie. Poke around Adopt A Pet—or spend the rest of your work day creeping through pupz in your hood. No judgment, y'all.
Images: marniethedog/Instagram
