Oh, the joys of oral sex. Sure, receiving it is awesome, but giving oral sex is important for your sex life, too. As much as I enjoy it now, I'll admit that I wasn't always a fan. The good news is that with the right partner and plenty of practice, you can learn to ~let it go~ and eventually become comfortable enough in your own skin to fully appreciate the wonder that is the oral orgasm. Learning to communicate what feels good will make you more confident and, ultimately, more likely to come. Needless to say, the more often your partner orally pleasures you, the more quickly you'll be able to achieve this zen attitude about getting eaten out.
As a young woman just starting to become sexually active, I was far too nervous about what I would smell/taste/feel/sound like to relax and appreciate the sensation. I can't speak for everyone, but I know a lot of women need intense mental focus in order to achieve an O. It can be a vicious cycle: If you're worried about whether or not you'll come, you're likely to get distracted, making it almost impossible to reach the ultimate goal.
Step 1: Find a partner who loves to exercise their tongue. Step 2: Reap the the benefits of a partner who loves to give — they extend far beyond the walls of your bedroom.
1. They're Giving — Probably in More Ways Than One
OK, I admit it: It took me until very recently to understand the double entendre of "nice guys finish last." Now that I'm enlightened, I have to say that I wholeheartedly agree. If your partner loves to go down on you, he or sheclearly cares about your pleasure, which translates outside the bedroom as well. Such a philosophy is inherently selfless and speaks volumes about their character. If your partner is focused on pleasing you sexually, he or she no doubt exhibits that same willingness to give in everyday life. Whether it's paying you compliments or running errands for you when you're sick, a giving partner is never overrated (especially when they're giving you orgasm after orgasm).
2. They Understand The Merits of Foreplay
On the other hand, giving oral does not necessarily mean they're aiming for you to finish. If your partner loves to give, they probably do it just for shits and giggles sometimes. It's a Monday afternoon and you're watching Adventure Time? Sure, I'll go down on you! A casual vagina-licking can work wonders: It gets you prepped for intercourse, brings you to the edge, and offers a totally different sensation than sex. Without the pressure of finishing, it's much easier to lay back, relax, and enjoy the act of getting eaten out.
3. They're Willing to Get Intimate
There's something undeniably intimate about both giving and getting oral, which is probably what makes it feel so good. If your partner is familiar with your private parts and regularly spends time with them, chances are he or she is extremely comfortable with you outside the sack as well. An established sense of sexual intimacy lends itself to emotional intimacy (and vice versa). A partner who loves giving oral no doubt feels close enough to you to open up to you about personal stuff, too.
4. Better Oral = Better Kissing
Sure, you might argue that this is more important the other way around: If you haven't hooked up with someone yet but they're a really good kisser, you'd probably get super hype about them also being good at oral. However, being a good kisser in and of itself shouldn't be taken for granted. I would wager a guess that you kiss your partner a lot more often than you engage in oral sex. How horrible would it be if they sucked at kissing?! If they're good at oral, they probably know how to work their tongue in more than one situation. Appreciate them for the orgasms as well as the perfectly passionate kisses they give your face lips, too.
5. More Orgasms, Duh
Do I need to explain this one?
Images: Mateus Lunardi Dutra/Flickr; Giphy (6)