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A Custom-Built Angry Robot. Good Idea?

by Alicia Lu

Despite words of caution from the likes of Stephen Hawking and Elon Musk, not everybody is quite so worried about the incoming robot takeover. New Zealand company, for example, Touchpoint Group is building the world's angriest robot, which will simulate enraged customers so that banks and companies will better understand what causes customer outbursts. Tech firm Touchpoint is investing $500,000 into developing the furious robot for a project called Radiant, named after Isaac Asimov's Foundation sci-fi novel series about a supercomputer called Prime Radiant that could predict the future behavior of humans.

Those books are pretty unsettling as it is. And they're fiction.

Scientists in New Zealand and Australia will input data collated from over the years and come up with algorithms that can better understand and predict customer anger. The project will examine how customers interact with certain products, policies, procedures, and individuals before reaching their boiling point.Touchpoint Group Chief Executive Frank van der Velden described the company's vision for the robot to The Australian Business Review:

The end goal is to build an engine that can recommend solutions to companies — and we’re talking about the people at the frontline here — how they can improve particular issues that customers are facing. This will be possible by enabling our AI engine to learn right across a whole range of interactions of what has and has not worked in past examples.

Touchpoint is developing the robot in collaboration with banks, telecommunication firms, and insurance companies, which will all benefit from the AI. But at what cost, I ask. At what cost? It's as if they've never seen a single sci-fi movie. If we've learned anything from decades of movies about robots, not to mention warnings from actual experts, this is what the Radiant robot could lead to.

One Day We're Going To Piss Off An Angry Robot For Real

And It's Going To Snap

It Will Be Smart Enough To Multiply

And Even Take On Human Form

Then Spawn A Faction Of Even More Evil Robots That Will Wage War With Humans

Way Scarier Than A Few Angry Customers

Their Only Goal? Destroy Humans And Human Life

All We Can Do Is Surrender

The World Will Burn

And Stephen Hawking Will Smile And Say "I Told You So" From The Safety Of Some Other Planet He's Been Saving As His Secret Emergency Post-Apocalyptic Shelter

Smart man.

Images: Giphy