Are you the kind of person just waiting around for an opportunity to send your enemies something? Well, PotatoParcel.com had you covered, as they will send your enemies a potato, complete with message of your choice scrawled on it, wherever you want! Given that potatoes are readily available (and much cheaper, as one of these will run you up to $9.99) at the supermarket, and the message is just scrawled on with Sharpie, it's probably something you could just do yourself if you were that way inclined, but I guess the site is a bit of a novelty. You obviously don't have to send a potato to your enemy, you could send it to a friend, but I feel like that would be weird. To my recollection, there are way more ways to say "I love you" than with a potato.
Cosmopolitan's Tess Koman tried ordering the potato with a message for herself, as assessed it thusly:
"... When I ordered my potato, I thought it would be funny to have it say "YOU KNOW WHY." A month later, I am unsure of what I was thinking. Regardless, the potato came all beaten up in a tiny envelope from Dallas, Texas. It was all so ... beige. It made me sad.
Hours later, I am still sad. Why would I send myself a sad potato? Why did it take so long to get here? Why is the potato soft? Potatoes have to go through a lot to get soft. How old is the person at PotatoParcel.com who did this to the Internet, to me?
I take away from it this: Revenge is indeed a dish best served cold. And half-rotten. You know why."
Here's Tess's potato:
And here are a selection of other potatoes purchased from the site and sent off to their respective destinations:
1. This simple potato message
2. This amazing pun-tato
3. This fortune cookie style potato
4. This funny joke potato
5. This nice but then rude potato message
The potatoes have spoken.