Kanye West Calls Himself "Boring", But What He Means To Say Is "I'm A Dad"

If you think your life is boring, try putting yourself in Kanye West's $100,000 shoes. The rapper has traveled to every country on the planet, dined at the finest restaurants, performed at sold-out venues, created a clothing line just because his talent knows no bounds, and married into the Royal Family of American Hotness. Where does one go from there? Well, according to the music and fashion mogul, the only answer to that question is: daughter North West's tap dance class. Kanye West called up New York City radio station Hot 97 this week to put a few silly rumors to rest and, in the process, set the record straight about his so-called wild life, reports Us Weekly.

Here's what the 38-year-old had to say to DJs Nessa and Ebro:

Right now I just want to take some time to really focus on my album... focus on North's birthday, just focus on my family and then be able to recharge, energize and then bring something of value. I'm completely boring actually. I don't wanna kill the blogs and the media takeout and everything, I'm so boring.

Just how boring can West possibly be, given all of the opportunities for fun just lying there at his feet at all times? How boring can it get for a guy who radiates this kind of intensity, possibly even when he sleeps?

This boring:

All I do is go to the studio every day. At this point I'm like, "I'm ridin' through the 'burbs with no woes. I'm not going nowhere with no woes." I'm not at the club... I'm never at 1OAK... I'm never gonna be nowhere... I gotta focus on the kids. I gotta take 'em to tap class, and you know, all type of gym class, where they do all types of swings.

I'll give him the tap dance part — sitting and waiting for your toddler to finish her dance class — no matter how cute North is — is shoot-me-now boring. But what is this magical gym he speaks of that features "all types of swings?" How does one sign up for such a thing?I believe West is confusing "boredom" with "parenthood." When I found out the male half of superpower duo Kimye had called up the station to address the rumor that he kicked everyone the hell out of a Chuck E. Cheese so his family could play there in private, I thought: #parentinggoals. But I've become increasingly aware of the fact that fatherhood tames even the fiercest of lions. I'm sorry, West, but North's job is to transform you into the pussy cat you are becoming. Don't fight it — embrace it. Become one with your fellow playground parent zombies. I await your arrival by the jungle gym — I hear they have "all types of swings" at the park, too.

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