Bartesian Is Basically A Keurig For Cocktails, Plus 5 Other Booze Robots That Will Mix Perfect Drinks For You
Why do we love our Keurigs so much? Maybe it's because they let us pretend we have our own personal barista in our kitchen. But you know what would be even better? Having our own personal bartenders — which is exactly what Bartesian, a pod-based cocktail machine, does. As the Daily Dot describes it, it's basically a Keurig for alcohol: You just load up your flavor pod, add the booze, enter your desired strength, and boom — instant drink. The only thing it doesn't do right now is sit there shining a glass with wisdom in its eyes, asking you about all the troubles in your life... but maybe they can program it to do that in the future. Currently crowdfunding on Kickstarter, the start-up has raised 29 percent of its $100,000 goal and still has 28 days to go; six types of cocktails will be available to start, including margaritas, sex on the beach, and "Bartesian breeze" (whatever that is) — but just think about all the possibilities for the future!
"Each Bartesian Capsule is made with real, premium ingredients," reads the device's Kickstarter page. "Fresh juice concentrates, non-alcoholic liqueurs, and bitters, all in liquid form. There are no artificial powders or high-glucose corn syrup in these capsules. This allows for quality taste and drinkability cocktail after cocktail." Oh, and did I mention that the capsules are recyclable? You heard that right: You can now drink alone ethically, without worrying that your killing the environment. Something tells me cocktail pods would be a little harder to repurpose than coffee pods, mostly due to the sticky nature of the ingredients.
Check it out in action here:
Booze robots aren't the things of the future; they're the things of the now. Here are other awesome robotic alcohol friends that actually exist in the world. What a time to be alive, am I right?
1. The Jevo
Basically another Keurig-inspired invention — except this one is for Jell-o shot enthusiasts.
Unlike the Bartesian, this one doesn't have pods; rather, you fill tubes with the desired ingredients. Still though — a robot that mixes me a perfect cocktail? Yes please!
This one even learns your alcohol preferences based on your moods. It's pricey, but maybe it's worth it.
This invention mixes your shot and then turns it into vapor for you to breathe in. I'm not sure how I feel about the idea of inhaling my alcohol... but hey. The future.
The explanation is in the name. I think this is a bad idea, but then again, I'm a huge fan of sharing my life with my bartender — which you can't exactly do with a vending machine. And what if your drink gets stuck half way down?