Here's your mandatory gross over reaction of the day: UK mom Sharon Green kicked up a massive stinker when she accused local bakery, Occasion Cakes, of putting vaginas on a cake with teddy bears, meant for 3-year-old daughter Tahlia Rose's christening cake—thereby completely scandalizing the toddlers, cake, and party goers. The cake featured two adorable, cartoonish teddy bears sitting on top, with horrific little lines between their legs, which obviously could only be vaginal gaping wounds.
Green complained to the cake store after serving the cake at the christening anyway (covering the bear's bikini areas with fondant flowers), and was met with deserved apathy by the store's manager. The manager said the lines were meant to represent seams where the bears were sewn together, which makes much more sense for a children's cake, and is completely plausible. Meanwhile, even if they were representing vaginas, who cares? Sharon and her daughter both have them, and a little lines on a teddy bear isn't exactly equivalent to a porno. Meanwhile, it's unlikely Tahlia, three years old, would even notice or make the correlation—and even if she did, I've never met a three year old who found genitals so offensive.
Meanwhile, here are some cakes that are actually a little bit weird, and some that are downright offensive, unlike the completely harmless teddy bear cake:
1. The penises on this cake aren't even the issue
2. Internal female anatomy or...
3. This cake was probably fine before it was cut in an unfortunate place
4. What a girl wants
5. This attempt at Minions
6. Maybe don't order over the phone...
7. Gooby, pls