Today in weird casting rumors: According to reports, Marisa Tomei might play Aunt May in Marvel'sSpider-Man reboot — aka, the role of the elderly, tough aunt who raised Peter Parker in the comics. Yes, 50-year-old Oscar-winning Tomei, who starred in My Cousin Vinnie and The Wrestler. I know. The world is a very strange place. Now, as anyone who has seen the last five Spider-Man movies, watched the '90s cartoon, or read a comic book knows, Aunt May is less sexy 50-something, and more strict octogenarian who will give you cookies.
Of course, there is nothing wrong with de-aging Aunt May (unless you happen to be an octogenarian actress who was readying her résumé for the role and who was already ticked about Sally Field nabbing the role in the last reboot) — and the idea of a 50-year-old having a nephew in high school isn't an unrealistic one — but this possible casting would certainly change the character.
As is to be expected, Twitter is exploding with fan reactions that prove everyone is pretty confused by this development. It's not that having Tomei on board is a bad thing (Tomei is awesome), it's just that she is an unorthodox choice. Is Aunt May going to be the cool aunt now? The new Spidey played by Tom Holland is 19, so it's not like Tomei isn't old enough to be his aunt — but she is certainly not old enough to be his fragile, retired elderly aunt in need of protection.
If you are having trouble adjusting to this bizarro world version of Aunt May, just know that you are not alone. These people are in the same crazy superhero casting news boat as you are.
1. This Guy Who Will Never Be Able To Look At Aunt May The Same Way Again
He is only speaking the truth. You know you were thinking it too.
2. This Girl Who Just Made All The Seniors In The Audience Cry
Someone needs to see Netflix's Grace & Frankie, STAT.
3. This Guy Who Shares All Of Your Fears
Hollywood doesn't think Tomei is old, right? This is just a case of them making everything younger and hipper... I hope.
4. This Guy Who Makes A Good Point
At the current rate of Spider-Man reboots and Aunt May's new tendency to age backwards he could be onto something.
5. This Person Who Should Be My New Best Friend
Hollywood will never love me this much.
6. This Guy Who Just Went Full Existential
And now I'm just going to crawl into the corner and wait for the inevitable — this is getting dark, guys.
7. This Guy Who Said What Everyone Was Thinking
Amy Schumer saw this coming because Amy Schumer knows all.
8. This Guy Who Understands There Are Endless Possibilities In The Bizarro World
There is definitive proof that stranger things have happened.
9. This Guy Who Points Out Aunt May Might Be Benjamin Button
The devolution of Aunt May is like Inception. It's a movie embedded inside a franchise of movies that no one never noticed until now. Quick, someone check and see if the totem is still spinning!
10. This Girl Who Is Bringing Perspective To The Party
To be fair, I freaked out over Field too. She's also way too young to be Aunt May.
11. This Guy Who Is Asking The Right Questions
Exactly! Someone give this Twitter user all the cookies.
12. This Guy Who Gets Straight To The Point
Do not hold your applause.
Do you feel better now? At least take comfort in the fact that Tomei is always amazing and you are not alone in not knowing what to think about Hollywood right now.