I have some pretty awesome plans for when I get super old. I am going to wear a ton of ornate caftans and over-accessorize with very big, very sparkly jewelry. I will never be without a bourbon smash in my hand. I will continue to wear very red lipstick, and I am going to shamelessly flirt with beautiful people a quarter of my age. I am also going to dance like this 97-year-old dancing great grandma, because she is a goddamn queen. As Grandma glows watching her cute 8-year-old great-granddaughter dance, someone off-camera instructs the pigtailed old woman to "Come on, Grandma." "You want me to do my thing?" she asks. OH MY GOD YES WE ALL WANT YOU TO DO YOUR THING, ADORABLE OLD LADY! Then, cane and all, she struts her stuff to Fifth Harmony and it is absolutely glorious. The curious among you should know that this is pretty much exactly how I, at 32, already dance.
I would be remiss if I did not also point out how terrifically fabulous the great-granddaughter is, by the way. First of all, the kid is so happy and into it. Second of all, absolutely nothing is distracting her or throwing her off her game. Not being filmed, not being closely watched by her beloved grandma, not her beloved grandma busting a move right beside her, not even an episode of Oprah on in the background. (I challenge you to get anything done when Oprah's on!) But as absolutely presh as this young one is, I'm going to have to declare great-grandma Winner of the Interwebz this round. Don't take it too hard, little one: There's absolutely no way you could have defeated her. She has 89 years of experience on you. Plus, the only thing cuter than kids is old people. (And the only thing cuter than old people is puppies... the only thing cuter than puppies is nothing. There is nothing cuter than puppies, don't be stupid... Well... except maybe a basket full of kittens cuddling tiny, kitten-sized teddy bears.)
Everyone, take note: this is what we should all aspire to.
Delight in the full video below.