My Best Friend & I Didn’t Talk For Years. Now We’re Closer Than Ever.

In the case of celebrities, fans aren’t often privy to why a friendship ends — though it’s always noticeable when a pair once connected at the hip are no longer spotted together. Rumors may make their rounds online, Deuxmoi may talk about it on her podcast, and blind items may run wild, but the truth is often concealed somewhere within the tight-lipped celebrity social sphere.

So goes the story of Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss, who were inseparable from 2013 to 2016, but seemingly distant in the years following. The fall-out is canon Swiftie lore, but no one knows exactly what happened — even if diehards have their own theories.

The friendship seemed to be a thing of the past, that is, until Kloss was seen at an Eras Tour show in 2023, not in the VIP tent, but sitting in the stands among regular fans. Then, last month, Kloss was spotted among the star-studded guests at Swift’s wedding. Some fans have theorized it was a “pity invite,” and that Kloss attending Swift’s concert was a sort of olive branch. Others believe it’s a sign that the two are friends again. For the most part, fans just want answers.

And while the truth will likely never come to light, regular folks who have had a big friend breakup — and subsequent reconciliation — are more than happy to share how it all went down. It may not be as juicy as years worth of A-list celeb gossip, but it might, at the very least, make you reflect on your own friendship conflicts and resolutions. Below, three women share why they stopped talking to their best friends and how they came back together after time apart.

“We would bite our tongues a lot to avoid conflict.”

Kat* and I met at our dads’ work party right after graduating high school. It didn’t take long before we were connected at the hip. We never really got into fights — in fact, I think we would bite our tongues a lot to avoid conflict, which ultimately led to our issues.

About six years into our friendship, I was dogsitting for her while she was out of town. Her puppy chewed up my headphones and was a lot more work than I expected. When I brought it up, Kat wasn’t very apologetic about it. I didn’t think it would bother me that much, but when she didn’t offer a solution, it made me really resentful. It brought up a lot of other things from the past — like we had gone on a trip with another girlfriend a few weeks earlier, [and] while the other friend and I were trying to be mindful of our budgets, Kat brought her boyfriend along and they wanted to do things we couldn’t afford.

We decided to take some time apart so that we didn’t say anything hurtful. Then a month later, I texted her to say I was open to talking if she was, but she wasn’t ready. We stopped following each other on everything. I went about my life and started investing in my other friendships and my faith.

Obviously we weren’t the same girls that we were.

Two years later, she got engaged. I reached out to congratulate her because it reminded me of all of the conversations we’d had about being in each others’ weddings. She asked if I’d want to go for a walk in the park. We both showed up really raw. She was honest about her side and I was honest about mine. Neither of us got offended about what the other shared. That sisterhood connection was still there.

After that, we were really intentional with how we would hang out, getting coffee or going to baseball games together, and naturally we fell into our old relationship. Two months later, she asked me to be a bridesmaid, and now we feel just as close as we were in the beginning. Obviously we weren't the same girls that we were at 18. We’re always going to be growing. Now we’re really good at communicating our feelings in the moment instead of letting them fester.

— Natalia, 30, Florida, insurance sales agent

“I am committed to her as much as I am committed to my husband.”

I met Madi* in eighth grade, but it wasn’t until we were about 15 that we became inseparable. Through every dark time, breakup, everything, we had each other’s backs. Throughout college and postgrad, she was dating the same guy, Carter*. When my husband and I got married in 2023, Madi was my maid of honor, and I think after my wedding she realized that Carter wasn’t her forever, so she broke up with him. That started the downfall of our friendship.

I used my husband’s air miles to fly from South Carolina to California to help her through the breakup, and by the time I got there, she was already introducing me to Joe, her friend’s older brother, who was recently divorced and had a child. She even left me at the apartment she was crashing at so she could spend time with him.

I never had to tell her how bad of a friend she was to me, because she knew.

Something about him was just off. I told Madi my reservations, especially that I thought she should be single for a while, and that him being in the military meant he wouldn’t always be around, but she said she could make it work. She would still call me once a week but one day, seven months into their relationship, I guess I asked too many questions about him or maybe it was my tone, and that was the final straw. She stopped calling me. A few months later, she had a bunch of friends fly out for her birthday, and I wasn’t invited. I knew our other friends saw the red flags too, but I was the only one who said it to her face, so she wrote me off.

I tried to reach out to her and tell her that we’re best friends and she can’t get rid of me, and she said if I didn’t support her relationship, we couldn’t be friends. We didn’t talk for about eight months. Then last summer, they went abroad for a wedding, and he drank too much and our other friends questioned her about it. Two weeks after that, right before he was deployed, she found out he had been habitually cheating on her and would tell his hookups that she was his babysitter. Once again, I drained our airline miles and flew across the country to be there for her. She was so down bad that she had to take two weeks off from work. I never had to tell her how bad of a friend she was to me, because she knew.

We’re in different phases of life now. I’m married and have a baby and she is having her first true adult single era. Our relationship ebbs and flows, but I am committed to her as much as I am committed to my husband. We’re going to be friends for life.

— Sarah, 29, South Carolina, marketer

“I felt so let down that I canceled my wedding.”

You know in high school, when you date your first boyfriend and then you break up and they date somebody after you? For me, that person was Shae. We hated each other. But eventually, seven years after she and my ex broke up, someone cut me off in traffic. I sped up to see the driver and it was Shae. She flipped me off and I messaged her on Facebook saying, “What are you doing driving like that?” And we ended up becoming friends.

We’d talk all the time, whether it was texting or on FaceTime while we’d be cooking dinner with our kids. We’d call each other out for things, but it never got nasty. Then, one day, my now-husband randomly said we should elope. I wanted to have an actual wedding and tried to pull off planning it in less than a year. Looking back, I understand my friends were under a lot of pressure because of the quick timeline. All of our budgets were tight. But when Shae couldn’t make it to some wedding-related celebrations, I took it personally. Then other people started to tell me things she would say behind my back, like that the pizza station I wanted at my wedding was tacky or that my bachelorette party was boring since I’m not a big drinker.

I loved her, but I knew I could not do that sh*t with a smile on my face.

I felt so let down that canceled my wedding about four months out. I made a post on Facebook and Instagram explaining why and said something like, “Heads up, we’re canceling our wedding. If I can give advice, it would be to make sure you surround yourself with people that want the best for you.” I knew I was being petty, but I was very upset. We had lost our deposit on the venue and everything.

Five months later, I eloped. Shae texted me that I looked beautiful, but I didn’t respond to her because I didn't know how to communicate my feelings. Soon after, Shae started wedding planning, and when she asked me to be a bridesmaid, I said no. I loved her, but I knew I could not do that sh*t with a smile on my face.

We didn’t talk for about five years. During our time apart I went to therapy and learned a lot about why I would speak to others the way I would. I learned that being a b*tch is different from being an honest friend. I've learned that people's feelings are theirs to have. Eventually, I saw her becoming friends with a girl I had beef with, someone who had actually once told me to end my friendship with Shae. I thought that she was trying to get back at me, so I made a petty post that was obviously about her, and she reached out and said, “Why are you still talking sh*t about me on the Internet?” I sent her a voice note explaining myself, and she started calling me out on everything I had done to hurt her. We talked every day for a week to clear things up.

Now, we’re back to where we were. We’re just two dumb*sses who talk all day long about anything and everything.

— Sky, 33, Florida, content creator

*Names have been changed

Interviews have been edited and condensed for clarity.