When you go on a date, especially a first date, there's probably going to be some awkward back and forth. You want to ask the right questions on a first date to help you get to know someone, but you also don't want to cross the line when talking to someone who's essentially a stranger.
“Asking great questions on a date can give you a lot of insight about the person sitting across from you,” Sarah Patt, matchmaker and dating expert tells Bustle. “By the end of the date, you want to be able to know if you connect with the person and whether or not you share similar lifestyles and values. Asking great questions will help determine if this person has what you are looking for in a partner so you can decide if their world is one you want to know more about, or become a part of.”
But one person's trash is another person's treasure — and one person's definition of an acceptable question is another person's "WTF!?" moment. Or at least that's what a recent AskReddit thread seems to show. People shared the worst question to ask when you're first dating someone, especially on a first date, and the results were wild. Not only because some the questions were downright offensive, but because some people have very strong opinions that you may not agree with at all. (Fun fact: you can definitely talk about politics on a first date). Here's what the folks of Reddit had to say.
1. "When We're Married, How Will You...?"
I guess that counts as a proposal? I mean, probably one you don't actually want, but it probably counts as one anyway. It's one thing to ask someone what they want, but it's another to assume. To assume you will get married.
2. "When's Your Period?"
I really hope this is a joke, but actually, my friend dated a guy who used to put unused tampons in water so he could understand her cycle better and now I'm not sure of anything in my life.
3. "How's Your Sex Life?"
I mean, I've probably asked it too because I was genuinely very bad at dating for a long time. Sorry, whoever that was.
4. "Can I Have A Kiss? Can I Eat Your Food?"
There are some more offensive and upsetting questions on this list, but this is probably the most shocking — sharing pasta on a first date, are you effing kidding me?
5. "Do You Masturbate?"
Is it bad that I would just assume they did? Is that really a question that needs to be asked?
6. "Do You Have Any Shame?"
Ooooooooh no. What the eff? I guess it's a quick way of knowing that you don't want to be with someone — that would settle it then and there.
7. "BLAH BLAH SPORTS BLAH BLAH?"
Yeah, I have 110 percent been there. So it's fine to talk about sports — or any hobby you're into — but let's keep things in context.
8. "How Much Do You Make?"
Again, I thought this one might of been a joke, but a lot of people posted variations on it, so maybe it's not.
9. Can I Bring A Friend?
This is another one that sounds like a joke, but I've actually asked this so it makes the list.
10. "What Food Should We Have At Our Wedding?
Depending on your rapport, this could come across as funny, but if you're not there yet and you guys are still just getting to know each other, this could come off as creepy.
Asking nothing at all and just sitting there in awkward silence? Maybe even a bad question is better than no question.
People obviously have very different ideas of what you can talk about when you're first dating someone. My thoughts? Be respectful, don't assume anything, and ask about whatever in this damn world is important to you. You're there to get to know each other, after all.