Life

These "You Can Only Keep Three" Memes Are The Low-Stakes Drama You Need Right Now

by Mia Mercado
15 “You Can Only Keep Three” Memes That'll Test Your Loyalties
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No global pandemic can keep our hunger for memes at bay. If anything, this time of self-isolation has only made us more ravenous for dank memes. First, there was the “choose your quarantine house” meme asking the age-old question: which rich and famous celebrities would you like to be stuck in a house with for 30+ days? Now, the “you can only keep three” meme has run rampant and Twitter has some strong opinions. Be warned: the choices may cause irreparable emotional damage.

The concept of the “you can only keep three” meme is simple: there’s an image with nine-ish different pictures of things in the same category (e.g. snack foods, pop stars, network sitcoms). Then, you must do what the caption says and only keep three thus banishing the other six in this scenario into hypothetical obscurity. Would you save Twix if it meant getting rid of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups? Which Friends regulars would you banish from the show? Which three of the beloved Lucky Charms marshmallows can live on in this bizarro “only three” universe?

It’s innocuous. It’s inconsequential. It’s exactly the kind of low-stakes drama we need right now, in a time of too many extremely high stakes things. Here are 15 “you can only keep three” memes to tear your group text apart. Proceed with caution.

1. '90s Nostalgia Edition

My entire personality was All That for most of elementary school.

2. Dessert Snack Edition

Little Debbie has left the chat.

3. Candy Edition

Fruity candy lovers, assemble!

4. Blockbuster Movie Edition

If we get rid of The Godfather, what poster will college frats hang on their walls?

5. Fast Food Edition

It's the ultimate test of burger, fries, and fast food allegiances.

6. Michael Scott Edition

Feeling very 9 right now.

7. TV Comedy Edition

Ron Swanson would hate this game, wouldn't he?

8. Sleepover Movie Edition

A universe without Mean Girls is not a universe in which I want to exist.

9. Sports Movie Edition

Space Jam over everything.

10. Pop Star Edition

Can I just pick three Ariana Grandes?

11. After-School Snack Edition

Lunchables, DunkAroos, and Gushers family, where you at?

12. Horror Movie Edition

If middle school me could have erased Halloween from her brain forever, she would have gladly done that.

13. '00s Cartoons Edition

Kim Possible must be part of your three. It's not even an option.

14. An Edition That Will Speak To Your Soul

This is less "only keep three" and more "which stage are you at right now?" It's 9, isn't it?

15. Meta Edition

Has your head fully imploded yet? Have your group texts erupted in fury? Perhaps this is the "only keep three" meme to end all "only keep three" memes.