Fashion

A Sexy, Lace Ta Ta Towel Lookalike Has Arrived & It’s A Lot

Courtesy SheIn

There comes a time in every young person's life when it suddenly seems that buying a sexy item of clothing that serves no purpose at all is a good idea. Often, this item is a bra. Usually, this bra at the very least exists to hold one's boobs in place — but not always. Enter: the sexy, lace Ta Ta Towel lookalike of your nightmares. You may find the silhouette of this embroidered lace item vaguely familiar, considering how viral the Ta Ta Towels went back in August. This, however, is an "open-back bralette," according to the SheIn website. But let's really break this down, shall we? This is essentially a boob scarf that seems to offer about as much support as a bib (should I trademark "Boob Bib" now or later?).

The casual (or is it oddly formal?) item comes in black with floral embroidery, or magenta lace, giving you a couple options for all your "boob hammock, but make it fashion" needs. Well, most of your needs. As one reviewer helpfully pointed out when talking about the item, "Like, don't run around in it." Indeed, this bra would not be the best for, say, a friendly game of aggressive ping pong or, I don't know, any movement whatsoever. But for everyday activities like laying flat on your back in bed or standing still for long periods of time, this is probably a good bet when you're looking for something with a little pizzazz.

Open Back Embroidered Rose Lace Bralette, $8, SheIn

For a mere $8, you can purchase the sensual not-Ta Ta Towel of your dreams. Not completely surprisingly, the reviews for the embroidered "bralette" are mixed to say the least, echoing the reactions to the original Ta Ta Towel. One reviewer noted that she should have sized up, but that "for day to day, it works and a bit more comfortable than underwire bras." One could also argue that you could just, I don't know, go braless and be even more comfortable, but hey — to each their own.

Another reviewer simply says, "It doesn't have any support...." The ellipsis leave a lot to the imagination, and while I can't read their mind, it's almost as if the punctuation is saying, "I should have known this, and yet I felt hopeful this would work anyway."

The magenta version of the bra (bra is a strong word, admittedly) is slightly more expensive than its embroidered twin, coming in at $9.

Open Back Embroidered Rose Lace Bra, $5, SheIn

The embroidery-free version also has a not-so-hot review from one person who tried the piece, unfortunately. "Cute idea! Not very practical. Continues to slip off!" they wrote simply. But, hey, who says clothing has to be practical?

This is sexy loungewear, people! For all those that weren't into the original Ta Ta Towel's terrycloth material, there is this. Maybe you want to neck-bra-and -chill in a way that's less "item you put on at the spa" and more "item you put on as an extra in the Jessica Alba movie Honey." This is your life! Your boobs! And I say practical or not, you do you.

There's no guarantee that this item will actually offer any support or, unlike the original Ta Ta Towel, any absorption of annoying boob sweat. But, it's like I tell myself every time I go inside a Target, convenient store, or basically anywhere at all: Sometimes you just buy something because it's $8 and it makes you feel damn good, and that's good enough for me.