A Trader Joe's Employee Answered Questions About The Store On Reddit & The Answers Are Fascinating

One day, humankind asked the almighty for reasonably priced products free of artificial ingredients and sold by people in Hawaiian shirts; and then we had Trader Joe's. Whether you're shopping for dinner, alcohol, or all-natural skincare products, Joe is all you need. But we have so many questions: are employees really that happy? Is the food truly natural? Why are there bells at the register? We're in luck: in a Reddit Ask Me Anything, a manager shared all kinds of hacks and secrets about Trader Joe's; and if you're on the hunt for some good, juicy gossip, I hate to break it to you — TJ's really is as good as it seems.

Our love for Joe knows no limits. When we need cheap alcohol to get wine drunk on a Friday night, Joe is there. When we're in the mood for the greatest snack ever, Joe is there. When problematic skin wreaks havoc on our lives, Joe is there. The products, the atmosphere, the insanely happy staff — TJ's can do no wrong. It's loved by the country over for its decor, its impulse purchases at check-out, and the pre-made wraps.

Oh... the pre-made wraps. Give me a minute.

It's not all that surprising, then, that this manager has nothing but good things to say about his employer. While you won't find this fellow drinking any TJ haterade, he still revealed some pretty cool things about Trader Joe's that we never knew.

1What's Up With The Bell At The Register?

Joe knows you don't want to be disturbed while perusing the frozen foods section; so instead of yapping over a loud speaker, they jingle bells, for a wonderfully Christmasy feeling. Yes, 'tis always the season at Joe's.

2The Seasonal Cookies Are The Bomb Dot Com

Joe's is where dessert items go to get a makeover. And if you go during a holiday, you're in for a treat. Seriously. Any holiday. Just pick one. Halloween. Christmas. Thanksgiving. Static Electricity Day. Joe will have something special for you.

3There Are NO Preservatives

One Redditor wondered why the bread goes stale so quickly, and here you have it. We're so used to our food being jam packed with chemicals that we forget it's suppposed to start to rot at some point. Reminder: if bread has been sitting on your counter for four months and still hasn't grown hair, something's wrong.

4Some Times Are Better To Shop Than Others

Boom. A solid TJ's hack. Go early and beat the crowd. Get all the best snacks and baked goods. Grab 'em before they're gone. Life is short, people. Shop in the morning.

5The Return Policy Is 100% Legit...

Did the Salsa Autentica give you heartburn? Return it. Did the hummus not live up to your expectations? Take it back. Did the salmon you purchased smell like a bin of dirty jock straps? Bye bye. Joe just wants to make things right.

6But They'll Know If You're Trying To Take Advantage Of It

Joe just wants to make things right, but please don't take advantage of his kindness. They probably won't call security on you or anything, but... just don't be that person.

7The Hidden Lobster Is For The Kids

Joe knows it's tough to shop with kids. They need something to keep them busy. Enter the stuffed animal. This might be meant for the wee ones, but let's be honest: more than one of us is guilty of covertly searching the store for the infamous but elusive stuffed lobster.

8The Pay Is Pretty Sick

In other news, we're all quitting our jobs and applying at Joe's.

9You Can Sample Almost Anything...

This kind of gives me Costco vibes. You could sample one product and then another and then another, and before you know it, you've had dinner.

Kidding. Don't mess with Joe like that.

10And The Rest Gets Eaten By Employees

So, hypothetically, if I wanted to sample 20 bags of plantain chips just to, you know, check for their freshness, that'd be kosher, right? Asking for a friend.

11Don't Expect To See TJ's In Canada Anytime Soon

Our condolences to our friends in the north. As a consolation, you did get ketchup chips. So, there's that...

12There's No Magic Trick To Getting Hired

Joe just wants to know you care about the important things in life — kindness, generosity, Mandarin orange chicken.

13Employees Are *Genuinely* That Happy

I'm sorry — is this the neighborhood market or heaven?