Donald Trump & Melania's Valentine's Day Plan Is Honestly Pretty Sad

People have poked fun at Donald Trump's relationship with Melania for the entirety of his time in office (beginning with that brief "Free Melania" phase). But the couple has faced even more scrutiny since his alleged relationship with Stormy Daniels made headlines. People wondered whether the scandal had put their relationship on the rocks, especially after Melania opted not to join her husband on his trip to the World Economic Forum. Likely to fuel this speculation is the fact that Trump and Melania might be spending Valentine's Day alone.

The president and first lady will certainly be separated during the day, although that's normal. Melania will be at a children's hospital in Maryland, the National Institute of Health's Children's Inn, where she'll be making valentines with patients.

"Mrs. Trump will spend an afternoon decorating cookies and making valentines and exchanging them with children currently patients at NIH and a few of their family members," read a statement from the Office of the First Lady on Tuesday.

Melania brought valentines and coloring books to another children's hospital a couple weeks ago. On Feb. 5, she visited Cincinnati Children's Hospital Medical Center and was briefed on how the opioid epidemic affects kids, especially newborns.

According to his public schedule, the president's day will not include any Valentine's Day-related activities. Instead, he'll be getting his intelligence briefing (i.e. looking at a single page of mostly graphics and maps), joining a tax reform working group, and signing a couple of bills.

It's less clear what he and first lady have planned for the evening. Unconfirmed reports that Trump will spend the night at the White House watching a movie and eating a private dinner don't say whether Melania will join him.

It's also unclear how Donald and Melania celebrated Valentine's Day last year. Back then, the first lady was still spending most of her time in New York City with Barron while he finished the school year, though she did have an official appearance in D.C. the day after Valentine's Day to welcome Benjamin Netanyahu to the White House. The president lunched with Chris Christie and his wife on Feb. 14, but Melania did not join him.

Trump's critics have found lots of material with which to make fun of him this holiday. The Washington Post published a cartoon in honor of the occasion: "Roses are red / violets are blue / we're trying very hard / to destroy democracy for you."

Stephen Colbert, meanwhile, imagined what a Valentine's Day card from Trump might be like by splicing together video clips of the president into a montaged message for his wife. It shows Trump repeatedly trying to address Melania but getting sidetracked into discussing his own supposed achievements.

"Melania, I just wanted to say, from the bottom of my heart — which, by the way, is so strong, good stamina, unlike Hillary," he says. "That's why she lost the election. Remember that? November 8th. Wasn't that a great evening?"

"But baby, I'll tell you what, my love," the clip ends, "I love U—tah. I mean, did you see how many points I won by [in] Utah?"

The mockery hasn't been reserved for the president and his wife: Donald Trump Jr.'s gotten a fair helping, too. Don Jr. was blasted on social media for a Valentine's Day gift suggestion he made on Twitter.

The bear and plane apparently come from the Trump Store, the Trump Organization's retail line that sells "the very latest in Trump branded merchandise."

If the president and first lady do spend Valentine's Day evening together, it might be overshadowed by the fact that Michael Cohen, Trump's lawyer, confirmed late on Tuesday that he paid Stormy Daniels $130,000 in 2016. Cohen said that he used only his personal funds for the transaction and still denies that Trump was involved with Daniels, but this news does seem to confirm that she was paid to keep silent about the affair.