The 26 Cleverest Things Ever Invented To Get You Off

Sex toys have come a long way over the years. From the dildos of ancient Rome to clunky 19th-century vibrators, old-school sex toys weren't exactly known for their ingenuity. Luckily, we've come a long way, and today, some of the most genius sex toys come in the form of high-tech massagers and wearable vibes that spice up getting off.

So what exactly makes a sex toy "clever," you might ask? For most people, it means the device itself can help demystify the sometimes confusing process of orgasming, and might even get you more in touch with your body's singular wants and needs. Not all sex toys do this: a basic vibrator, for instance, is only capable of so much, usually. But the toys selected and added to this list are known not only for their cool factor, but also because they truly deliver the goods.

Whether you're in the mood for oral sex or you just really want a toy that can help you explore prostate stimulation in new ways, the weird but brilliant sex toys below offer a little something for everyone. And as an added bonus? They also happen to be some of the best you can find online, period.

1The Cadillac Of Vibrators

The Hitachi Magic Wand is a classic vibrator that's never gone out of style — for good reason. More than 1,700 reviewers on Amazon say that this vibe is a life-changer, and since it initially hit the market in 1968, it's been celebrated as one of the best and most powerful massagers out there, especially for clitoral and vulva stimulation. While you can get the cordless version of this toy, the corded one remains a powerhouse of intensity, even though it technically only has two speeds. Whether you're just starting to build a collection or you're an experienced sex toy shopper, this is one gadget that absolutely lives up to the hype.

2A One-Of-A-Kind Piece Of "Furniture" For Your Bedroom

Whether you're playing with partners or by yourself, get all the hands-free satisfaction you need with the Liberator BonBon. This sex mount provides support for different positions, just like a standard Liberator Wedge does, but this one offers a little something extra, since it's designed to fit most dildos and vibrators, too. This means you can pair it with your favorite toy for a unique experience that's sure to rock your room's decor, not to mention a few other things.

3This Innovative Stroker That'll Blow Your Mind

Strokers come in all shapes and sizes (literally), but this one from Tenga is in a class all of its own. Unlike the highly popular Fleshlight and similar penis masturbation toys, the Flip Hole isn't meant to mimic a real anus, mouth, or vagina. Instead, it has a soft silicone interior, hard outer case, and flexible front buttons, which, all together, help create a pleasurable, squeezing-like sensation as you thrust. Another reason to love the Flip Hole is that it actually flips open so you can lubricate and clean it easily. One reviewer weighed in: "The one word to remember when using this toy is ... slow. Don’t get all worked up and go at it like a teenager after his first conquest. Take your time and work this thing slowly so you can feel all the bumps and ridges. Your patience will pay off in big ways!"

4A Set Of Candles To Heat Up Foreplay

Wax play can really heat up your approach to foreplay, but using regular candle wax on bare skin can cause burns and all kinds of discomfort, especially if you're new to it. That's why these low-heat candles are so damn good: they have a lower melting point than standard candles and create a hot sensation, but won't actually burn skin. They're basically just sex candles, but because they cast a warm glow, they can be great in non-sexual settings, too.

5This Clitoral Vibrator That Recreates The Feel Of Oral Sex

Prefer oral stimulation to everything else? This clit vibrator from Paloqueth should rise to the top of your shopping list. It mimics the feel of getting head, combining powerful vibrations with a sucking functionality. Built to be whisper-quiet and discreet, this toy is cheaper than other leading suction-based toys out there, but it's just as satisfying. Since it's also waterproof and made from soft silicone material, you can use it in all kinds of creative ways. Reviewers say that because of how powerful this toy is, you may want to ease slowly into it, otherwise the suction can feel very intense.

6One Of The Coolest Looking Dildos You'll Ever See (And It Feels Pretty Incredible, Too)

When you're looking for a lifelike feel, VixSkin dildos are some of the best around, since they're made with dual-density silicone. They're also compatible with most strap-on harnesses. But the Mustang is just a little bit better than your average dildo, even from Vixen Creations. It comes with a suction cup base and at only 6.5 inches long, it's not too big, which makes it a great gateway toy for beginners new to dildo play or strap-on use. Another reason to dig it? The Tie-Bright shade this Mustang comes in makes it one of the most striking and playful options around. "It has an impeccable balance of squish to firmness thanks to the dual density silicone. Plus, as someone that's typically skeeved out by realistic toys, the tye-dye keeps [it] nice and fun," wrote one reviewer.

7A Strap-On Harness That's Actually Comfortable

Strap-on harnesses aren't exactly known for being comfortable — but this jockey-style harness from SpareParts actually is, and that's a big reason why it's one of the most popular and best-reviewed harnesses on Amazon. Made with a soft and stretchy nylon/spandex blend, this harness offers all-day wearability that makes it feel almost like a second skin. It also comes with a super stretchable O-ring that can fit a variety of dildos (including the Mustang mentioned earlier), which means you'll have a ton of options when it comes to finding the right fit for you and your partner.

8This Wireless Plug That You Can Control From Up To 20 Feet Away

Love anal stimulation and eager for a way to incorporate your partner into backdoor play in new, fun ways? This wireless anal plug is amazing with or without a partner, but because it comes with a remote and can be controlled from up to 20 feet away, it's a thrilling pick if you want to spice up date night. Made from super soft silicone and featuring 10 vibration modes, this butt plug is on the smaller side. That can be a big perk for beginners starting out with anal play, but for more experienced kinksters, it might not be quite enough to get the job done.

9A Set Of Kegel Beads That Increase Sensitivity And Build Endurance

Kegel weights are a gift to vaginas, especially if you're trying to increase tightness or enhance sensitivity. This two pack from LELO can be a great option if you're just starting to explore kegel beads since they come in different sizes and have a handy silicone harness, which makes it easy to remove them when you need to. "These are fantastic. The fact that they are intact with a string for easy removal is so much nicer then the typical kegel beads," wrote one reviewer. Reviewers say these beads can be especially helpful post-childbirth for improving issues with incontinence and improving pelvic muscle tone.

10This Wearable G-Spot Vibe That You Can Use In All Kinds Of Creative Ways

For G-spot stimulation that'll leave you shaking for more, this wearable vibe is one toy you've got to try. Equipped with nine vibration functions, this silicone gadget can directly press against your most sensitive areas and delivers a sensational vibrating feeling. While this works best for the G-spot, reviewers also say it can be great for testicular stimulation, and since it comes with a wireless remote control, you can use it with your partner while you're out and about for even more fun.

11A Cheap Yet Surprisingly Useful Restraint Kit For BDSM Newbies

For BDSM beginners, this restraint kit provides all the basics you'll need to start experimenting beyond vanilla play. This set comes with two velcro handcuffs and two shackles, and because the straps themselves are nylon, they're resilient but gentle on sensitive skin. The straps themselves are long enough that you can install them underneath your bed, so you can sprinkle a little kink into every sexy adventure you embark on. Even experienced kinksters can find use out of this cheap but effective set, say reviewers. "I was NOT expecting to be as content with the product as I am," wrote one reviewer. "If you are new to bondage then I cannot help but assume you will love the product. If you are a seasoned practitioner like myself, then get creative and upgrade your gear."

12A C-Ring For Better Stamina And More Intense Orgasms

Cock rings serve many great purposes, but finding one that does it all as well as this one from SVAKOM is a tall order. It comes with a mighty but quiet motor and has five different modes and speeds, so it provides vibrating stimulation to the penis, clit, and testicles. Like a standard C-ring, it can help prolong erections, but since it also has soft nodules, it can stimulate the clit as well. Waterproof and easily rechargeable, this C-ring is also easy to care for over time.

13A Life-Like Hand To Make Your Fisting Fantasies A Reality

Molded from adult performer Belladonna, this realistic hand and forearm toy is weird AF. It's also a great option if you want to explore fisting solo for added stimulation. Fashioned in a "duck billing" position that makes it easier to insert and remove, this latex-free PVC toy gets major kudos from users. "My girlfriend absolutely loves this. She first purchased the closed fist but was unable to fully fit it in. She decided to try this open fist which she can fully fit in and [used] it to work up to the closed fist."

14This Unique Rabbit Vibe That Can Transform Into Literally Any Kind Of Stimulator

Love prostate stimulation and the restriction you get from a good C-ring, but also wish you had a toy that worked just as well to massage the clit and G-spot simultaneously? Well, you can have it all with this vibe from LELO. Made from waterproof silicone, it vibrates and comes with flexible rabbit ears that twist and contort, so literally any kind of stimulation you crave is easy to achieve. Reviewers say it's perfect for couples and threesomes, too.

15An Exquisite Hand-Blown Glass Wand That's Unlike Any Other

This glass wand is hand-crafted to perfection with amazing detail, but once you get past how sleek and stunning it is, you'll go nuts over just what you can do with it. Since it's glass, you can explore temperature play by running warm water over it to heat things up (or cold water to chill it). One distinct feature that this wand has over others is that it also comes with cat-o-nine tails made from genuine leather, so if you've never tried a glass wand before, this could be a great start.

16This Strap-On Vibrator That Doesn't Require A Harness

If you enjoy pegging but get frustrated by frequently having to adjust your harness mid-act, the Feeldoe by Tantus could be just what you've been looking for. This strapless strap-on provides skin-on-skin contact and allows the wearer to get extra stimulation while pegging a partner. The shaft has an insertable length of nearly 7 inches, and it includes a removable bullet vibrator, so you can get even more stimulation while you use it.

17This Aloe Vera Lubricant That's Great For Those With Sensitive Skin

For those with sensitive skin who are looking to replenish moisture, this pH-balanced gel lubricant is essential. Made with 95 percent aloe vera, this vegan lube glides like silicone but is safe to use on all toys, and since it doesn't have any traces of glycerin, it won't get sticky or tacky when it dries. If you're prone to dryness and irritation, this gel comes highly recommended.

18A Super Cute, Totally Discreet Vibrator That Looks Like A Lipstick Tube

Need a vibrator that's portable and easy to conceal from prying eyes? Then you'll love this bullet that looks just like a tube of lipstick. It comes with 10 unique vibration speeds and is waterproof, so you can take it with you in the shower or pool for some underwater fun. This toy is also rechargeable via USB, making it a great choice to travel with.

19This Handy Vibrator With An Almost Perfect Five-Star Rating On Amazon

This vibrator is basic, but what it lacks in dynamism it makes up for in delivery. This toy always delivers results, or so say reviewers on Amazon, who quip that this waterproof toy makes an amazing addition to bath time and more importantly, is a great entry toy for those who have never tried a vibrator before (and who may be looking for something less expensive than something like the Magic Wand). It has 10 vibration patterns and recharges easily, so you can get plenty of use out of it.

20A Water-Based Lubricant That's Safe To Use On All Your Toys

A good water-based lube, like this one from Shibari, is great to stock up on, especially if you use a lot of toys and prefer more slickness during play. Hypoallergenic and non-staining, this lube delivers a soft sensation that enhances almost any kind of intimate activity. Reviewers say they love how safe this is to use with toys and that it doesn't leave behind a greasy residue like other lubes can.

21This Anal Plug & Vibrating Bead Combo

Beginners can get so much use out of this vibrator and bead combo, especially as they're exploring anal stimulation for the first time. This comes with seven vibration modes, plus rounded balls that can help train the anus to be more receptive to other kinds of stimulation. Reviewers say this rechargeable, waterproof toy is also good for G-spot stimulation and operates at a whisper-quiet level.

22A Glove That's Definitely Not One Size Fits All

This fearsome glove is perfect for more advanced kinksters and those who enjoy a little more adventure when it comes to anal stimulation. Made from stretchy material, each finger is curved, so you can use each digit in a different way and explore what really makes your motor hum (or your partner's), especially for prostate massages. One reviewer wrote: "The different textures on each finger make it an amazing fun toy! Very durable, not made of cheap rubber. This will last a long time. Longer than my ex girlfriend!"

23This Candle That's Great For Sensual Massages

This relaxing candle is a treat to the senses. Once lit, the wax liquefies into a massage oil that feels warm on skin, but it absolutely won't burn or leave any telltale marks behind. Made without any traces of parabens or paraffin, this candle can burn for up to 32 hours at time. It's formulated with shea butter, jojoba oil, soy, vitamin E, and aloe, a combination that nourishes skin and works well for stimulating massages.

24A Couple's Vibrator For Bridging The Gap

When you're a long distance apart from your lover, this couples vibe can help keep the passion going strong. This C-shaped vibe comes with a wireless remote and has 10 super-quiet vibration modes. Using the We-Connect app, you can also create personal vibration rhythms that sync up with your partner's pleasure spots. And, since it's waterproof, you can also bring it along in the shower for added fun.

25This Funky Massager That Feels Like Several Tongues Massaging At Once

This pocket-sized massager might look intimidating, but don't be turned off by its peculiar design. The small but powerful toy recreates the feel of oral sex, but not through suctioning motions; instead, you'll feel like there are 10 tongues at once, all of them working hard to massage and stimulate your most sensitive area.

26A Gel Enriched With Primrose Oil That More Than 2,800 Reviewers Love

Can a gel designed to kickstart arousal really work? According to reviewers on Amazon, it really can. "Didn't think anything would help me. Taking medicines and all, its [sp] really hard to feel anything. This really made a difference," wrote one reviewer of this arousal gel, which is made with natural mint extract to deliver a tingling sensation unlike anything else. This gel can also help increase sensitivity, especially in the clitoral region, and it's made with primrose oil, which is a treat for the skin.

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