7 Fake Love Facts That'll Ruin Your Relationship


Love is a many splendored thing, as the classic romance film would have you believe. Or as goth rock legends The Sisters of Mercy re-framed it, "a many splintered thing." Given the multitude of perceptions on how to do love just right, Twitter used Valentine's Day as an excuse to sort through all the fake love facts out there with the trending hashtag #FakeLoveFacts. Thoughtful, I know.

With the frightening proliferation of #AlternativeFacts at this moment in history, it's getting more and more difficult for certain folks to separate what is fact and what is fiction. Concepts such as objectivity and reason and the scientific method are becoming relics of the past, replaced with a new kind of absurdity that is threatening the sanity — and quite literally, the lives — of untold numbers of Americans. But, on the upside, at least we have Twitter to sort out what is patently ridiculous when it comes to love. This includes: stalking, talking about your ex constantly, telling your partner “I love you” to shut them up during an argument, and, of course, that the number of emoji used by your partner in a text is directly correlated to the intensity of their love for you. Here is a compilation of the best #FakeLoveFacts:

1. Love Is Best When It's Over The Top

2. Talking About Your Ex Always Helps A Relationship

3. There Are Lots Of Quick Fixes In Love

4. More Emojis = More Emotions

5. Love Comes In Limited Quantities

6. Romance Never Wanes

7. Love Requires Little To No Work