"Bacon, bacon, I love to eat, bacon, bacon, a delicious breakfast treat! Bacon, bacon, it's packed with flavor, but oh-so difficult to heat." That's a song I just made up because I'm so excited that a bacon toaster actually exists, and think it deserves a prelude jingle in its honor. I mean, this invention is basically a NECESSITY, because we've all been there: it's breakfast time, we're drooling for bacon, we actually went grocery shopping for once and have bacon, but the prospect of cooking the bacon on the stove just involves a few too many greasy things that will need to be cleaned and you're way too tired for that. And many of us have learned the hard way that desperately cooking bacon in a regular toaster can literally end in flames. Most of the bacon we eat is at restaurants because when it comes down to making it at home, it's too complicated and messy. And, it's never as quick as the package says, because the package doesn't include all the time it takes to wash the pan, and wipe down the grease speckled kitchen. That's why this new bacon toaster is a breakfast game changer.
Nostalgia Electrics, a company that sells all sorts of — you guessed it — nostalgic electronics, (like vintage popcorn machines, old school ice cream makers, and retro appliances galore) is the vender behind the bacon toaster, aka, the Bacon Express. Oh, how I love products that hit the nail on the head. The Bacon Express makes eating bacon, faster, easier, healthier, and more manageable. The handy dandy contraption can cook up to six pieces of bacon at a time. There's a dial that lets you fine-tune your cooking preferences — do you like a little chew to your bacon, or are you all about that crunch? — and an easily removable non-stick cooking tray for simple clean up. The bacon cooks vertically, so that all of the grease can drip off and collect in to that pan, which expedites the clean up process.
This small, lightweight appliance will easily fit on your countertop and certainly make your morning breakfast grind a lot smoother. Pop your bacon in the toaster while your eggs cook, and by the time they're ready, your bacon will be too. It's a great way to streamline the cooking process, not to mention, it allows for there to be some consistency to the way your bacon is cooked. It's all too easy to over cook or under cook your bacon, but the Bacon Express will eliminate that margin of error. It's foolproof, perfectly crispy bacon every time, no matter how much or little attention you pay to it while it's cooking. So if you're like me and often fall into a Snapchat hole while you're cooking and often fill your kitchen with the smell of burnt-no-longer-edible meals, you're going to obsessed with this product that won't let you fail.
No, it's not too good to be true. It is a real thing, and it's only $34.99, which makes it the perfect holiday gift for a fellow bacon lover. Heck, this is going to be my new go-to gift for everything. Weddings, birthdays, baby showers — everyone's getting a Bacon Express so that I can ensure a streamline of perfectly cooked bacon no matter where I go. You're welcome.
Now, all we need is a machine that cooks your eggs however you like them, and then self cleans. Then we'd be living in a breakfast forward fantasy world.