I’m going to let everyone in on a sneaky lil secret: women...are people. Did I just shatter your world? Was that a dramatic gasp I heard from across the internet? I mean, duh, of course, women are people. So, living with women comes with all the nuances one would expect from living with other human beings. However, one guy’s Twitter thread about living with women captures those nuances with shocking accuracy. If you have ever lived with a group of women, or if you are one of those women, you will relate to these tweets on a spiritual level.
In a 15-point tweet thread, Twitter user Craig Shapes shared his experiences since moving in with his girlfriend and her best friend. “Some of the shit I’ve seen is EYE OPENING,” he wrote. And thus, he began to walk his followers through the saga of living with women. While he isn’t the first to share the details of living with women from the male perspective — another man’s tweets about his experience living with women went viral in December — Shapes tweets are certainly relatable.
Quick warning: Hair ties will be strewn, an inexplicable hair will be shed, and yes, women will talk about poop. “‘I NEED A POO’ is probably the most used phrase in this house,” Shapes tweeted. What I’m saying is, those not yet versed in the tales of living with women may want to proceed with caution.
He started by talking about his roommates’ need to share every text, tweet, and message they get. “Girls don’t need screenshots mate,” he tweeted. “They have photographic screenshot memories.” As a woman, I legally cannot confirm or deny this.
Shapes immediately dispelled any rumors that women don’t poop. Which, good. Those rumors need to die a constipated, poo-less death. People poo. It’s fine.
Then, he got into the hair ties.
“Oh my days the hair clips,” he tweeted. “I could have a fucking bath in the ones I find on a weekly basis.” This I can confirm with both pride and apology. I am guilty of losing and leaving bobby pins in places that make no sense. On the kitchen counter? Sure. One the arm of the couch? Don’t mind if I do. On multiple occasions, I’ve started washing my hair only to find a rogue bobby pin nestles near the nape of my neck. How long had it been there? How did I not notice? Who knows. Bobby pins defy the laws of time and space.
Shapes’ thread isn’t completely devoid of female stereotypes. He talks about how his girlfriend and her friend make an ordeal about getting ready to go out. He does, however, include some nice details that ring particularly true to any woman who’s ever gotten ready with other women. “There’s meetings, catwalk shows, endless compliments,” he tweeted. “And it’s sometimes an actual 2 man job [because] some dresses have back zips that would literally be impossible for one girl to reach.” Women do know how to give a uplifting, platonic compliment. And for the love of all that is fashion will people stop making impossible to zip dresses? Putting on an outfit should not require a buddy system.
And then, Shapes mentioned the candles.
Candles will change your life, my dude. Who doesn’t want their home smelling like a Bath and Body Works?
He also preached truth about bathrobes and dressing gowns.
It’s true. Nothing feels quite so luxurious as lounging in a dressing gown.
Of course, you cannot talk about living with women without talking about...The Hair.
When my partner and I first moved in together, I’m pretty sure I had an actual conversation about the hair that I will shed. Once, he asked me if I was “putting hair” on the shower walls. I had to explain to him that as intentional as it may look, my hair has a mind of her own.
I literally shed more than my dog, which feels like betrayal on her behalf. And honestly, she should learn to keep up with my hair habits.
In the end, Shapes shared that living with women has as many ups and downs as living with anyone of any gender.
Again, women are…people.