The weekends when Last Week Tonight doesn't air to help fans make sense of the world can be difficult. And keeping this in mind, the host released a short online-only clip to help you get along. John Oliver showed unaired graphics from the past season and made more than a few jokes along the way — including one about Ivanka Trump that you won't want to miss.
Oliver's not back at work yet, though, so there's no comments on any of the latest attacks on the body politic. No, Donald Trump's press conference with Vladimir Putin will have to wait until the end of July, when Oliver is back after his summer break.
"We taped this before we went away, so I don't know what awful things have happened in the world since July 1," Oliver said in the three-minute video posted to the show's YouTube Channel. "Envy me. I honestly don't know."
He then went on to show the graphics, which he uses on the show to add to his jokes and biting sense of humor. One of them was the graphic of Ivanka Trump, which shows her sitting with a tea cup. Upon closer look, it's Trump's head photoshopped onto actress Catherine Keener's body.
"This graphic of Ivanka Trump as the mother from Get Out," Oliver says, introducing the image. Keener played the mother of the creepy Armitage family. "It looks eerily real because it's depressingly plausible," Oliver continues.
Before that joke, though, Oliver put up a picture of a makeup artist putting blush on a live salmon — complete with the mirror and all. "Which was presumably designed to illustrate a joke," Oliver goes on to say, "but looks a lot more like porn for people who are sexually attracted to seafood."
Next was an invented condom box for dogs reading "trusted for over 100 dog years." It's used to "prevent litters" and is easy open for "all paw types."
"Appropriately called, 'Ruff Riders.' I honestly don't know why we made this one," Oliver tells the audience, laughing in the background. "The important thing is, on this show dogs fuck. That's canon."
Following that was a special joke for the news media. "We never got the chance to show you this picture of a journalist squirrel. His name is obviously Edward R. Burrow, because he digs deep, whether he's investigating a story or burying a little nut with his tiny, small hands."
The Trump graphic was not the only scary one. Oliver next showed a graphic of a red panda literally eating his heart out — he went on to call it "unsettling" but noted that it's "something that, apparently, I'm delighted by." Oliver is smiling with his chest cavity exposed and the panda eating away.
He shot through several others, including badgers that play hockey, a woman in a hospital who seems to have just given birth to a watermelon, and a "disgruntled" parrot who "seems to be angry about something." He made it clear that was a euphemism for himself and that the show was even nearly named after a such a creature.
"Some of our graphics are weirdly specific, like this image of a Civil War soldier petting a racist unicorn next to Abraham Lincoln," Oliver continues, showing a photo of just that. "There's no way to know what that means, but I think we can all agree with Abraham Lincoln that it definitely deserves a thumbs-up."
But the next-to-last visual of the show isn't a photoshopped graphic at all, but a real photo. Nancy Reagan was captured sitting on Mr. T's lap as he's dressed as Santa Claus. "To be honest, [that] wasn't cut from our show because it was never part of our show. That's a real photograph," Oliver says. "I just thought it was important to remind you magic exists."
The last one you'll have to watch to see. Sorry, Jeremy.