Queer Love Stories

Caroline & Nat First Met At A House Party Over A Decade Ago

“When she looked into my eyes and told me I was sexy, I fell apart.”

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Welcome to Queer Love Stories, a series dedicated to celebrating the power and joy of LGBTQ+ relationships. Below, we meet 32-year-old Caroline, a writer, marketer, and photographer, and her partner, 30-year-old Nat, who runs the coffee shop and roastery Element Coffee. The West London couple first crossed paths back in 2005, but it wasn’t until four years later that they decided to make things official. Fast-forward to 2023, and the happily married pair are approaching their second wedding anniversary. Naturally we wanted to know more. So we put them to the test, Cilla Black style, and asked them to answer our questions – about what their first date was really like, the attributes they love most about their partner, and just how well they know each other. The catch? They had to do so separately and couldn’t share their answers with each other. Get ready to be in your feels.

So how did you meet?

Caroline: I was an awkward and lanky teenager at my first house party. Someone had thrown up on my hoodie and my best friend was making out with a guy I liked. So, I sat in the corner crying while drinking disgustingly cheap vodka. Nat came out of nowhere and asked if I’d like to hang out, cry, and talk about our feelings — so we did.

Nat: We met at a house party in 2005. She was crying and I wanted to know why, and see if I could cheer her up. We ended up spending the entire night together, singing metal songs and drinking poorly mixed vodka lemonades.

What was your first date like?

Caroline: I can’t remember if we even had one. Our relationship journey is a strange one, so I’m not sure if we ever had an official first date. Although, I do remember us eating a severely undercooked lasagne on the floor of my bedroom one time.

Nat: Our first date consisted of an upside-down mirror balancing on cardboard boxes, with a tablecloth thrown over it. It was the first time I had ever made lasagne, and it’s safe to say that I’ve improved since then! The cheesecake, however, was one we will never forget.

What were your first impressions?

Caroline: I thought she was the coolest person I’d ever met, even though she was two years younger than me. She always had a fag hanging out of her mouth and also sang beautifully.

Nat: I just remember that I couldn’t stop staring at her eyes. And I still can’t.

“When she looked into my eyes and told me I was sexy, I fell apart.”

How long have you been together?

Caroline: Officially, 13 years, though we dated for a few months when we were younger. We never count that, though, because it was a weird and turbulent teenage time.

Nat: This year will be 13 years!

Describe your partner in three words

Caroline: Generous, compassionate, and hot (as hell).

Nat: Sexy, stylish, and cute.

If you could choose a song that reminds you of your partner, what would it be?

Caroline: Probably something emo like “Chasing Cars” by Snow Patrol, because she used to sing it to me when we were younger. We listened to a lot of depressing s*it back in the day. Also, “Ohio Is For Lovers” by Hawthorne Heights. Bloody hell, that’s a throwback.

Nat: “Tears Don’t Fall” by Bullet For My Valentine. I still remember calling her when I went to Download Festival so she could hear them live over the phone.

What’s your favourite memory with your partner?

Caroline: We’ve been together so long we have a million, but probably the day we got married. It was such a beautiful moment, surrounded by the people we loved, and I don’t think I will ever forget the look on her face when she put the ring on my finger. I don’t think she ever thought this was a reality that she could live.

Also, getting locked out of my cousin’s house while we were in Los Angeles was pretty funny. She fell down the stairs while trying to use her Monzo card to break in to the house. We cackled for what felt like hours.

Nat: This is a really hard one as we’ve shared so many ridiculously good memories together. I would say right up there would be the day we got married. Second to that is the night we spent in a Japanese onsen overlooking the Fuji Five Lakes when we had just gotten engaged.

What’s the worst thing you’ve argued about, and how did you make up?

Caroline: We only ever really argue about food. I’m really indecisive and she gets stressed with me.

Nat: Food. It’s always food. Usually because she can’t make a decision as to what to eat, and I end up getting hangry. The resolution is I cook something yummy, and we both calm the f- down.

When is your anniversary, what’s your partner’s favourite colour and film?

Caroline: December 18, 2009 is the day we got together. September 18, 2021, was our wedding day. I think her favourite is green or turquoise, and she loves the Harry Potter films — but also loves Hackers.

Nat: We got together on December 18, 2009, and got married September 18, 2021. She doesn’t have a favourite colour, and I think her favourite film is Fight Club.

Did you get them right?

Caroline: Almost! My favourite film is Labyrinth.

Nat: Yes!

What were your green flags when you first met?

Caroline: I saw how caring and considerate she was to those around her which I really appreciated. She was always so attentive and really listened when you spoke — the greatest way to lure an insecure straight girl in, I would say. When she looked into my eyes and told me she thought I was sexy, I fell apart.

Nat: She completely understood my sense of humour, and has the exact same. She also had great taste in music (that was so important when you’re a teenager), and was overtly sensitive about animals and nature.

What is your partner’s best attribute?

Caroline: She’s very empathetic and has an immense amount of love in her heart. She’s been mistreated by friends in the past, which is sad to see, but I think it’s down to her giving nature.

Nat: Her mind, and the way it works. I love the way that she thinks.

What would you say your partner brings out in you?

Caroline: As cheesy as it sounds, she makes me realise I’m worthy of love. She makes me feel seen and heard. She also always encourages my creative side, which I love.

Nat: She taught me that it’s important to care for myself, and I feel that in the way that she cares for me.

How does your partner make you feel accepted?

Caroline: For a long time I couldn’t come to terms with my sexuality. I lied about it so much because I couldn’t fathom the idea of being with a woman. Being with her made me realise that I loved Nat the human as well as Nat the woman. Now, I love the idea of being with a female, because the connection.

Nat: Well first off, she married me, so that’s a dream I never thought would come true. And secondly, I feel seen and heard by her, always.

Do you have a joy-filled love story that you’d like to share with Bustle UK? Email ukcontributingeditor@bustle.com with Queer Love Stories in the subject line to be featured.

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