OK, feminists, how are we doing after starting off this debate with the visual of a bunch of Republican men awkwardly running atop the GOP Debate stage like a pre-game football line-up in Friday Night Lights? Everybody still with me? Please keep all arms, legs, and limbs used for protesting inside the activist vehicle as we navigate through the tricky Fox News jungle of tonight's GOP debate. Once we are in Ted Cruz's direct line of vision, you may display your pro-choice banner high and proud. You could even start by grabbing some poster board and writing about all the times the GOP debate make millennial feminists cringe.
As we know, Republicans like to say some crazy stuff when it comes to the health, overall rights, and the general existence of those who identify as women. By now, Scott Walker has already said that he will run as a pro-life candidate and has taken a jab at Planned Parenthood; I'm planning a Margaret Sanger tribute tattoo in protest.
OK, so it's not like we've never heard Walker talk about the archaic ways he thinks women should live their lives, but it's pretty ridiculous to see this happening in real time. I wonder if we can just replay any and all anti-women quotes in slow-mo and set them to Lily Allen's "F*ck You Very Much?" That was much more than a casual suggestion, by the way.
Let's take a look at all the put-downs, misdirected comments, and insults. Here are some quotes from the GOP debate that might just tick you off if you're a millennial woman.
Donald Trump Doesn't Care About Being Politically Correct When It Comes To Women
When Megyn Kelly asked Donald Trump about whether he is part of the war on women, he basically told her yes.
"I have been challenged by so many people, and I frankly don't have time for total political correctness; what I say is what I say," Trump said. "And if you don't like that Megyn, I'm sorry." After the debate, Kelly said she saw Trump's comment as a threat to her as the only female moderator. When Trump brought up his past attacks on Rosie O'Donnell, reminding us of Trump's sexist attacks on the comedian. Holy misogyny.
Scott Walker Opened His Mouth & Talked About Abortion
Of course the first abortion question went to Scott Walker, and he pretty much said all of the conservative, pro-life things that every pro-choicer thought he would. Making sure all of America knows he believes abortion is murder, Walker then moved on to just completely avoid part of an abortion question. When asked if he "would really let a mother die" instead of having an abortion, Walker just, well, didn't really answer that question. Hmm, my uterus and I are not too comforted by your silence there, bud. Yikes.
When Jeb Bush Acted Fishy About Planned Parenthood
When he was asked about his position as a pro-life politician and his involvement as a board member of Bloomberg Philanthropies (which funded Planned Parenthood), Bush said he didn't pay attention to that part of the organization's budget. Hmm. Thanks for ignoring your budget, and in the same fell swoop, just choosing not to recognize women's rights — and then confirming you wouldn't have been OK with it if you had known.
That One Time Mike Huckabee Said Super Regressive Things About Trans People In The Military
Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee has a pretty interesting perspective on trans issues, and when I use the term "interesting," I definitely mean "problematic." But if I always used that word, to describe how I feel tonight, this whole post would repeat, "problematic" as many times as Fox News corespondents would like to play "Benghazi" on a blaring loop during a Hillary Clinton interview. Here is Huckabee's quote in full:
"The military is not a social experiment. The purpose of the military is 'kill people and break things. It's not to transform the culture by trying out some ideas that some people think would make us a different country and more diverse."
Whoa. That's a lot to handle there, Huckabee.
The Lack Of Gun Control Talk
This might seem out of place for millennial women to care about, but trust me, it's not. The GOP debate barely even touched on gun control, and that's actually something we really need to care about. Misogynistic shooters are becoming more and more common, and that's something we can't ignore.
The Fact That Megyn Kelly Was The Lone Female Voice, And She's Not A Candidate
So, it's pretty clear that Megyn Kelly pretty much killed it tonight, and though she brought up many feminist points — prompting a bunch of cis dudes to talk about rape, abortion, and the general treatment of women in this country. But, again, Kelly wasn't the one on the debate stage. The fact that we had to ask 10 Republican men their opinions on women's health actually makes my uterus just want to boycott this entire night.
Black Lives Matter Was Barely Discussed, Too
It’s as if the GOP debate organizers specifically didn't mention things they knew would make the candidates look bad. The Black Lives Matter movement has gained a ton of traction over the past year, with racial issues polling as one of the top issues affecting our country right now. Many women of color are disproportionately affected by police brutality, but the one question to Scott Walker about the movement was breezed over without Walker ever even saying anything close to the words Black Lives Matter.
The Candidates Were Stuck In The Past
Like, was this the 1950s or something? Let's rehash this one: Mike Huckabee said the purpose of the military was to "kill people and break things" while also managing to disparage transgender rights. Got it? Yeah, that really did happen. Then, the candidates argued over who was more against women having the right to choose. And even though John Kasich straight up admitted he is old-fashioned and believes in traditional marriage, he provided arguably the most controversial statement Thursday night when he said he'd still love his daughters if they were gay because God teaches him to love unconditionally.
These Candidates Really, Really Want To Defund Planned Parenthood
So, just in case you didn't know that #DefundPlannedParenthood is a thing, it is. And to make matters worse, the cisgender dudes onstage are so about that plan. Mark Rubio's said that he's been on team Defund Planned Parenthood long before it existed, and I'm pretty sure Ted Cruz said God sent him to take away all of the money from the national women's health care provider.
So, there you have it, young feminists. Seriously, let's check in. I think it's time we all took a little self-care break from this debate madness. What we really need is a hug from former Texas Gov. governor Ann Richards (AKA Warrior for Women), but the next best thing is probably binge-watching Broad City until we fall asleep and dream of a future with plenty of IUDs and no more misogyny. Sweet dreams, my dears, and keep up the good fight.
Images: Giphy (2)