Lifetime has once again produced a film about "what really happened" behind-the-scenes of our favorite childhood sitcom and this time around, it was The Unauthorized Full House Story , and let's just say it... it was amazing. It came along at such a unique time for fans of the family-based sitcom — it is truly the Full House renaissance with Fuller House in production — that I kind of hoped this movie would prove all the haters wrong. And, after an entertaining couple of hours (the movie is purposely hilarious, guys, how can you not enjoy that?) we were left with a pile of questions that need to be answered about Full House . (Two hours was not enough, Lifetime. We want a sequel.)
The questions I have are part rhetorical, but also part dead serious. When I ask "why?" I really want to know why. The movie, which covered things from behind-the-scenes of filming to the actors' personal issues, left me sitting on my couch slowly humming the Full House theme song in hopes of forgetting all of the many emotions I had just been put through during the time I spent watching it (reliving that final episode is basically just a sob-fest). So, here's everything Full House fans still need answered because we refuse to let anything go, ever, hence why Lifetime probably made this movie in the first place. Full House fans are always craving more content.
(First, press play to set the mood.)
Here are the questions The Unauthorized Full House Story left us with:
1. Where was Comet???
2. So did Bob Saget come up with the Danny Tanner clean-freak thing?
3. Why did John Stamos think he was "washed-up" at 22?
4. Does Dave Coulier always leave his phone in the microwave?
5. Did Candace Cameron actually just storm into the executives' office to re-audition?
6. Did those in charge know that they had speaking Mary-Kate and Ashley actors for baby Michelle Tanner?
7. Why was Jodie Sweetin portrayed as so sad all the time?
8. Did Jodie Sweetin have bongo experience before that musical number?
9. Why did the wardrobe feel so current?
10. Is Bob Saget really a "sexual athlete"?
11. John Stamos definitely changed his late '80s look by the end of the series. This is not a question.
12. Did John Stamos, Bob Saget, and Dave Coulier really sit around the set and ask "Wouldn’t it be great if real life were more like Full House?"
13. The "Dead Sisters Club"?
14. Why did we only get a glimpse of Steve?
15. Why wasn't there more Gibbler?
16. What ever happened to Episode 1 Danny Tanner, John Posey?
17. Was that guy pissed, or nah?
18. Why was Jodie Sweetin still so young at the end of the movie?
19. Couldn't they have made Bob Saget a little dirtier?
20. We couldn't get one authentic Full House Jesse and the Rippers song?
21. Did Bob Saget really refer to his own house as a "full house"?
22. Where was "You got it, dude"?
23. Where was "How rude"?
24. Nicky and Alex? Hello?
25. When is the Lori Loughlin/John Stamos star-crossed lovers movie coming to Lifetime?
26. Seriously, they couldn't even get Jesse and the Rippers' number one hit, "Forever"?
27. Whatever happened to predictability?
Images: Scott Schafer/Lifetime; Giphy (8)
