How To Have Better Video Chat Sex, Because You Can Cuddle Afterward

Long-distance lovers around the world know that having video chat sex can be hella hot. Thanks to the invention of tools like Skype and FaceTime, we can now all interact with and have sex with our significant others no matter where we are in the world. While I’m sure most people would prefer doing it IRL, there’s no doubt that there’s something special about doing it over video. It’s a whole new way for people to explore their sexualities and as the technology gets better and better, so does the sex.

Most people are pretty new to video chat sex because, well, it’s only very recently that it was even possible to look at each other while we talked over a long distance. And do you remember how terrible Skype was at first? When you couldn’t make eye contact and your call was pretty guaranteed to drop at least eight times a minute? Those were definitely not ideal circumstances for sexy video chatting and it was only just over a decade ago that Skype was founded. So yeah, we’re pretty much still all novices when it comes to video chat sex. Which means, of course, that video chat sex can get awkward and weird, fast, more often than most of us would like.

With that in mind, I’ve rounded up a few tips for keeping video chat sex sexy. Whether you’re new to the video sex game or an old hand, these will help you make the most out of your next session.

1. Prep Beforehand!

If you’re someone who takes a while to get turned on or you just want to jump right in, spend a little time priming the pump before you hop on to chat. Spend a little time fantasizing and masturbating on your own to get in the mood. It’ll make it easier to get over the inevitable awkwardness that is the first few minutes of video chat sex.

2. Foreplay Is Still Important

While you can’t kiss and stroke each other through the computer (yet), you can get each other warmed up with your words. Getting started on video chat can be awkward, so make your partner feel better by complimenting them on how they look, telling them how they make you feel, or talking dirty. Ease into taking of clothing and explicit touching and you’ll find that you’re both ready to amp things up in no time.

3. Clean Up Your Space

Video chat sex is a very visual experience so prep your space like you would for a date: pick the clothes up off the floor; wash the dirty dishes; make the bed. Show a little respect for the person you’re playing with by not presenting a cluttered, dirty room.

4. Speak Up!

Video chat sex is often as much about talking as it is about doing. Tell your partner you love what they’re doing and ask for what you want. If you want to see more face and less cock, for example, say so! Unless one of you is a pro, video sex is a two way street. You are both there to turn each other on so be dedicated in your pursuit of both your own pleasure and your partner’s.

5. Don’t Focus Only On The Genitals

Sex — video sex included — is about the whole body. With that in mind, don’t train the camera solely on your genitals. Show your face, your chest, your belly, your shoulders. Show your partner how your whole body is reacting to what you’re doing. And, yeah, of course there are points when close ups on genitals are really sexy. Just don’t do it the entire time.

6. Incorporate Toys

While regular old sex toys are definitely hot when you’re having video sex, there are also a whole host of options out there that let you “touch” your partner now with app-connected sex toys. Check out Vibease if you’re a beginner or Kiiroo if you’re looking for something a bit more immersive.

7. Spend A Little Time On Pillow Talk

So you can’t cuddle but that doesn’t mean you get to turn off as soon as you get off. Spend a little time whispering sweet nothings to each other once you’ve both had your fill. It’ll make you both sleep better; I promise.

Want more of Bustle's Sex and Relationships coverage? Check out our latest video on sex positions for small penises.

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