8 Ways Mr. Ratburn From ‘Arthur’ Is All Of Us

It all started with an episode of The Best Thing I Ever Ate. One evening, I was watching a rerun of the Food Network show while I tried (and failed) to figure out how to sync my cordless headphones up with my iPhone. When chef/TV personality Marcela Valladolid began raving about an insanely delicious looking dulce de leche cake, I set my phone down, stared at my television scree, and stopped blinking. Why don't I have cake right now?! I thought. I should always have cake in the house. Cake is the best. Cake with every meal, please. And that's when it hit me: I am the suit-wearing, third grade-teaching rat from book series-turned-PBS series Arthur. I am the cake-obsessed luddite Nigel Ratburn.

For nearly two decades, I believed I was most like D.W. Read, the titular character's younger sister. Like Dora Winifred, I roll my eyes and sigh a lot. Like Dora Winifred, I had a chin-length bob for years. Like Dora Winifred, I love a library card. Like Dora Winifred and “Crazy Bus,” I don’t see any issue with playing one song on repeat for days on end. I was confident I couldn't possibly identify with another Arthur character any more than I identify with D.W.

I was wrong. I was very, very wrong. Turns out, I relate to Mr. Ratburn on a very real level.

He Knows It's Important To Maintain A Healthy Blog-Life Balance

Otherwise, what will you blog about?

He Is Not Immune To The Internet's Siren Song

The World Wide Web is such a thrill!

He Isn't Exactly Tech-Savvy

I never did sync up my cordless headphones and iPhone. But hey, the actual headphone cord works just fine. You call it "giving up"? I call it "letting go."

He Takes The Buddy System Seriously

If my friend asks me to go to with her to the mall on Black Friday, I will oblige, even though I know it's going to be a beyond stressful experience. A true buddy doesn't let a buddy dive into the choppy waters of the busiest, most chaotic shopping day of the year alone.

He Loves A Pun

There's only one thing I love more than a good pun, and that thing is...

CAAAAAAAKE

I've yet to meet a cake I didn't like.

When It Comes To Cake, He Is Ruthless

Sorry, kid. You snooze, you cakeless.

His Appreciation For Cake Will Never Wane

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And why would it? Cake rules.

Images: PBS; solohabloespanol-deactivated201, whisperintoa** (2), imlindana, totobomb, heart, roabeart/tumblr