Long live the king. After many long years, the Disney Channel is premiering a new Lion King movie called The Lion Guard: The Return Of The Roar. It's set to follow Simba and Nala's youngest child Kion and his bevy of animal friends as they join forces as protectors of the Pride Lands adopting the name of (wait for it) The Lion Guard. The film is then supposed to segway into a later TV series following their adventures. Hmm... you have to think, in a world filled to the brim with tons of Disney sequels, how hard will this film and series have to work to stand out?
Listen, you guys know how I feel about sequels (that they are largely unnecessary much of the time, but occasionally enjoyable when done well). I will say this, though: Lion King 1 1/2 is an unparalleled delight, and Lion King II: Simba's Pride really wasn't that bad, as far as sequels go. It is plausible that the team behind those movies more-or-less know what they're doing. So whatever, let's just go HAM with all of the Lion King sequels, am I right? Why stop here? The Pride Lands are rich with adventure, people, waiting for the stories of them to be told.
The film is slated to debut on the Disney Channel November 22 at 7 p.m. Until then, consider these other proposed Lion King movies.
1. Lion King 2 1/2
It's been great watching over Simba and Nala's children, but, at long last, the lions are old enough to get by without their guardians. Timon is finally ready to settle down and spend his twilight years retired and basking in Hakuna Matata. But Pumbaa starts to feel a lack of purpose, and decides he's ready to adopt again. Will these two life partners work it out?
2. Lion King 2 3/4
Kiara and Kovu are feeling the love tonight, and it gets them into a little bit of trouble. Kiara feels that she's a little too young to get the circle of life spinning again. Does she have what it takes to raise a child in this unforgiving wilderness?
3. Lion King 3: Simba's Second Cousin Twice Removed
Simba's distant relative Zarah has no designs on being queen, everything the sun touches will never be hers, and all she wants is to get through another week without lion mutiny, is that such a tall order?
4. Lion King 3 3/8: Modern Pridelands
This rockumentary series takes a look at the wacky family dynamics between Simba, his kin, and his wacky band of friends. Tell us what you guys really think of Timon and Pumbaa's antics. #JimHalpertFace
5. Lion King -2
Finally, we get to learn what Rafiki was doing during the events of the Lion King... you know, besides making drawings out of fruit juice.
Following the success Maleficent, we have this beautiful live action film that paints the famed brother-killer in a more sympathetic light. Stay tuned for Sam Smith's cover of "Be Prepared" during the end credits.
7. Zazu Takes Vegas
After polishing up show tunes during his tenure with Scar, Zazu decides to make his previously loathed chore into a career. But will the high-risk, high-reward Vegas lifestyle elevate Zazu to star status, or will he be dancing at Cheetah's Club? Only time will tell.
8. FLIPPED: Elephant Graveyard
After years of bad green lighting and hyena infestations, some brilliant wombat Zebra interior designer makes that place sellable. Honestly, you can get so much work done with a little help from Homegoods.
9. Hyena Kingdom
When Ed falls into a deep depression, he starts questioning his very role as a hyena. Can he find his purpose, and his groove, once more?
10. How Nala Got Her Groove Back
Speaking of grooves. OK, so your best friend has disappeared and your pride is being controlled by a sadistic dictator. What's a young lioness to do? Embark on a journey of self-discovery, of course.
11. Paranormal Activity: Lion Ghost Cam
Simba claims to see hallucinations of his dead father everywhere, so Nala installs a camera in Pride Rock that shows what isn't typically visible to lions. What the tapes reveal are shocking.
OK, so some of these might be a little bit ridiculous for Lion King sequels, but, hey. There are so many stories left to be told in the Pride Lands, and The Lion Guard is only the beginning.
Images: Disney/Youtube (1); Giphy (12)