The Reason Grammar Matters In Online Dating

Of the several friends I have doing the online dating thing, one of their biggest complaints, aside from the on slot of inappropriate messages from men, is the poor grammar in a lot of the profiles. Whether it’s because someone’s in a rush when they made the profile, or simply think that their hot photo will win over prospective dates, grammatical errors in dating profiles are far too common. So common in fact that Grammarly and eHarmony teamed up to conduct a study about just how much poor grammar in dating profiles affects chances of love. What did they find? That grammar matters.

The study looked into 10,000 profiles on eHarmony, of both men and women, to see just how all those misspellings are throwing a wrench in your chance to get a date. The written long-form answers were analyzed for accuracy in not just grammar and spelling, but punctuation, too. What they found was that women make almost twice as many grammatical errors per every 100 words than men do. But while that’s the case, women are less likely to be judged by men for their grammatical errors.

According to the findings, just two spellings errors on a profile can reduce a guy’s chance of getting a response by 14 percent. However, for the women out there, their grammatical errors didn’t impact their chances of getting a response all that much. We’re such hypocrites!

Takeaway? When it comes to online dating, grammar matters. Here are eight reasons why.

1. First Impressions Always Matter

Even if you’re a knockout in your photos, you still need to convey, in words, what other things you have to offer another person. You also need to outshine your competition and in the dating world there is a lot of it! If you can’t take the time to differentiate between “your” and “you’re,” you’re pretty much doomed. 

No one wants to get a message that reads, “Your really interesting. Is that you're dog in that photo?"

2. After Personal Hygiene, Grammar Is What Matters Most

According to a study by Match, for their members, 96 percent of women and 91 percent of men regard personal hygiene as the most important quality when it comes to dating. But second to hygiene is grammar, with 88 percent of women and 75 percent of men putting grammar before someone’s confidence and even their teeth.

3. Punctuation Errors Can Cause Scary Misunderstandings 

When putting together your profile, obviously you want to mention your interests. If your interests are cooking, your family, and your dog, then great! But let’s see how that looks when you disregard commas: “I like cooking my family and my dog.” Now you’re a person who kills their family and dog for food. Not exactly dating material.

4. Proper Grammar Makes You Look More Attractive

Not only does correct grammar make you look, well, smart, but more attractive, too. As one participant in research by WSJ explained, “When you get a message that is grammatically correct and has a voice and is put together, it is very attractive, it definitely adds hotness points.” As for anyone who sends a message littered in typos and grammatical mistakes, those are usually deleted immediately.

5. Attention To Grammar Shows You’re Making An Effort

While we may live in a world where it’s so easy to rely on acronyms or the dreaded “u,” in place of “you,” but because you want to make that aforementioned great first impression, you want to show that you made an effort. Anyone who relies on short cuts or doesn’t double check what they wrote in their dating profiles or in the subsequent messages they send, are basically showing they don’t care enough to the take the time.

6. Bad Grammar Can Get You Labeled As Fraud

According to research by Sift Science, a fraud detection company, fraudulent messages are often riddled with typos and grammatical errors. In the study, it was found that when people opt for “ur” instead of “your” or “you’re,” their message is almost four times more likely to be flagged as fraud. The same goes with overusing lowercase letters where capitals should be.

Basically if the messages you’re sending look something like that, you’ll not only be ignored, but flagged and your profile may be taken down all together.

7. Making A Date Could Prove Difficult

Let’s say that the person you’ve met online has decided to turn a blind eye to the grammatical errors on your profile because you seem nice enough, and it’s time to make a date to finally meet up. Well, aren’t you going to look like a total ass when your message reads, “What time should I meet you their?” That sentence alone is a boner killer. It can also lead to confusion, like who’s “their?” Their house? Their bar? I’M SO CONFUSED. Oh, do you mean “there?”

8. There Are Many Grammar Snobs Among Us

To get to the point, the world is full of grammar snobs and you never know when you’re going to run into one. As John McWhorter, a linguistics professor at Columbia University, told WSJ, “Grammar snobbery is one of the last permissible prejudices. The energy that used to go into open classism and racism now goes into disparaging people’s grammar.”

So don’t let your grammar errors stand in the way of happily ever after. Instead, take the extra time to formulate full sentences, skip the acronyms, and finally learn how important a common is… that is if you’re seriously looking for love. If knot than ignore this and u due you. (See what I did there?)

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Images: berc/Fotolia; Giphy(7)

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