If you are completely obsessed with the holidays like I am, there are certain things you know to be true. Like, for instance, you still hate the gap-toothed jerk in the second grade who tried to tell you Santa isn't real. But, like your mom said, "The day you stop believing is the day you stop receiving." So, you keep on believing, and keep on obsessing over the holidays, girl.
It doesn't matter if you are the only 20-something in line to see Santa at the mall, or that you send out pictures of you and your dog in matching Christmas sweaters as holiday cards each and every year. If you are the kind of person who relates more to Buddy the Elf than most other humans this time of year, keep reading. There is a special place on the Internet for holiday-obsessed people, and you have found that place. Congratulations, my friend.
So raise your milk and cookies, grab your dreidel, and put on your tacky holiday sweater — because you are in for a treat. No matter what it is you are celebrating this time of year, here are 15 things all people who are obsessed with the holidays know to be true.
1. You start watching holiday movies the day after Halloween
Beginning with Nightmare Before Christmas, of course.
2. You have a lucky dreidel
Eight crazy nights? More like 40 — you start early. THOSE CHOCOLATE COINS WILL BE MINE, GRANDMA.
3. Decorating the tree is a ritual
GET AWAY FROM THE CRANBERRIES, BOBBY. YOU'RE NOT STRINGING THEM RIGHT.
4. Holiday shopping is your cardio
Let's just call it like we see it — you totally give the best gifts.
5. Your wrapping paper is always on point
Saks Fifth Avenue has nothing on your wrapping skills... probably because you have a closet dedicated to fancy bows and wrapping paper.
6. You have two — OK, 10 — holiday-themed Pinterest boards that you update on the reg
If you had the money, your house would totally look like Santa's enchanted dream house, and you'd bake perfect red and green sprinkled cookies and decorate your fireplace mantel all day long. Why do you have to do things like WORK? Ugh.
7. Holiday theme parties are your jam
You always win the ugly Christmas sweater award.
8. This is your idea of a perfect day
Anyone who disagrees is a Cotton-Headed Ninny Muggins.
9. You're always down to carol
~*Last Christmas I Gave You My Heart*~
10. You can be seen with a red cup in your hand at all times
You practically run on gingerbread lattes.
11. You have a favorite reindeer
Everyone picks Rudolph, but you're more of a Blitzen gal.
12. Holiday desserts are bae
Christmas cookies, pumpkin pie, pecan pie... you love and cherish them all.
13. Everyone can tell which house is yours
The astronomical power bill cost is well worth it.
14. You have to resist the urge to sit on Santa's lap at the mall
Your mom has to pull you away from the crowd of three-year-old kids before you can cut in front of them. "SANTA! I KNOW HIM!"
15. And, in the end, you know that holidays are about more than gifts
They're about the people you share them with (and, also pie). <3 <3 <3
Images: New Line Cinema; Giphy (15)