When you're flirting with a lady or fella you're into via text message, do you specifically hold off on texting back to avoid seeming too eager? I'd love to say that I've never done this, but, well, I've mostly never done this. If you have, though — or if you have friends who have — then there's a web app for that now: Txtwar will tell you when you should respond to that text. I'll be honest: Every single part of my being says that you should just text someone (or not text someone) whenever you feel like it. I will admit I have specifically put my bag on the opposite side of the room so as not to be tempted to reach in and text a boy-of-interest so he would think I was off doing some daring fun mysterious adventure without him; but I'm still a little weirded out by the app. Who needs "rules" about when you should or shouldn't text anyone, anyway?
For what it's worth, Albert Chang, the creator of Txtwr, acknowledges the whole thing is kind of dumb: "Obviously this is all just for fun," he said to The Daily Dot by way of a disclaimer. Here's how the site works: you fill out questions asking about your gender; you rate your own looks and the looks of the person you're into; you rate the impression you've made on this person and how much you like them; and then you tell the site how long they took before sending their last response and how long it took you before sending your last response. (By the way, even though I've used gender-neutral pronouns here, the web app right now allows purely girl-boy pairings; this will change soon, Chang says.) Then, the app spits out how long you should wait before sending your next text.
Do I like that something like this exists? Not really. But after feeling mild annoyance for a few minutes (and isn't that all Internet outrage is these days, anyway?), I can see its use. Chang told The Daily Dot that he made the app, in part, because he "was kind of tired of [his] friends asking [him] how long they should wait to text girls back." And then I realized: An app that keeps me from having to listen to my single friends talk about their crushes is probably a net good, to be honest! Imagine a future in which every inane question has a corresponding app you can point to instead of having to engage with the question. I think that might be a kind of utopia, right?
Anyway, off to text my live-in boyfriend for the first time in days! I'm thinking something sexy, like: "Takeout?"