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What Bush Should Be Doing Instead Of Bocce Ball

by Abby Johnston

The pressure is on for Jeb Bush as the Republican candidate's campaign has been floundering in the past few weeks. He was embarrassed at the GOP's last rendezvous in Boulder, he's failed to make any recent attacks on his opponents stick, and he's continued to drop in the polls. So what does a presidential candidate do to prep for what is, perhaps, a last-ditch attempt to save his campaign? Well, if you're Jeb Bush, you play bocce ball.

Yup! Bocce ball! An hour and a half before the debate started, the former Florida governor tweeted a photo of him in the middle of his bizarre new debate ritual. That raises a few questions. Who in his pre-debate posse was willing to play with him? Why did said individual also think that was a good idea? And, most importantly: Is Bush is better at bocce ball than he is on the debate stage?

To be fair, at this point it can't hurt to shake things up. Bush is currently polling at 3 percent nationally, so there's really nowhere to go but up. Previously, Bush said that his pre-debate rituals included going to mass, going to the gym, and, as CNN put it, "vigorous emailing." Bocce ball does sound way more fun than any of that!

It's understandable that a candidate would want to calm pre-debate jitters with something far removed from the daunting task ahead of them. But Bush needs all the help on the debate, and publicly playing a game most appreciated with a beer in hand is essentially setting him up for public jabs. Here are some suggestions on what he could be doing instead...

1. Yelling At A Cardboard Cutout Of Marco Rubio

ROBYN BECK/AFP/Getty Images

Bush had his ass handed to him by his former political understudy, Marco Rubio, at the last debate, and all eyes will be on the ongoing war between the two candidates during the fourth debate. The problem is, Bush can't seem to properly land his critiques of Rubio. He's gone after him tooth-and-nail about missing Senate votes, which elicited a collective yawn from potential Republican voters. The softball insults could have something to do with Rubio being Bush's protégé, so perhaps the candidate could steel himself by practicing with a fake version of the Florida junior senator.

2. Figuring Out What Other Dangerous Babies He'd Kill

It was the aforementioned vigorous emailing that got him into this one. When asked about the most bizarre email he'd ever gotten, Bush volunteered that he was asked if he would kill an infant Adolf Hitler if given the opportunity. "Hell yeah, I would," Bush told The Huffington Post. "You gotta step up, man." So perhaps Bush should mull over if he would off a tiny Joseph Stalin in case someone springs that on him on stage.

3. Dropping Out Of The Race

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Because let's be real here, he's finished. And this way, he could be playing a lot more bocce ball.