The 1980s 'Bernie Speaks' Cable Access Show Unquestionably Needs To Be Resurrected By The Sanders Campaign

I have information that has made me completely giddy for at least an entire hour. Everyone: Bernie Sanders had a public access TV show in the 1980s, and it was called Bernie Speaks. I mean, on the one hand I'm thinking well of course he had a public access show in the 80s, but at the same time I'm so delightfully surprised. For one, it's clear that Bernie Sanders probably has worn the same handful of sweaters for the last three decades (which is wonderful), and he has had the same hair 'do for about the same amount of time. Most of all it's magical to see Sanders in such a truly grassroots mode. I can't imagine how low budget this show must have been ... 100 bucks? If only Bernie Speaks were still on the air. It seems like it would be one of the best campaign tools Sanders could have at his disposal!

To retain the magic that only old school public access can capture, modern day Bernie Speaks would have to remain preposterously low-budget, and hopefully still be recorded using a camcorder. Though instead of being on local public access where only a select view could watch, it could be on late night cable or something. Like maybe 2 a.m. on CNN or something like that. Sanders would still have plenty to walk around town and discuss with citizens, especially now that he needs their votes to get nominated for president. Here's what I think Sanders would talk about if only his lovely show were still on air.

Socialism Explainer

Of course, Sanders would need to explain to the good people of the United States what Democratic Socialism is. It's been discussed in the debates, but not in any great depth because of time constraints. I'd love to see Sanders walk around and ask local folks what they think socialism means, and then listen to him explain it, excited grandpa style.

All About The Hair

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Perhaps not unexpectedly, Sanders' hair was almost exactly the same in the 80s on Bernie Speaks as it is now. To play on one of his quirks, it would be hilarious to see a slideshow of Bernie's hair throughout the decades (he used to have curls, you know!). Endearing much? I think yes.

Wall Street Exposed!

To spice things up, Sanders could do a "gotcha!" episode on Wall Street. Last month during the Democrats' first presidential debate, Sanders stated that "Wall Street regulates Congress" and not the other way around. I can't think of anything more amazing than an extremely low budget exposé of the relationship between Congress and Wall Street.

Gazillion Dollar Update

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In January, Sanders said that in order to run for president, a Democrat would need "a gazillion dollars" to run their campaign. I'd like for Sanders to record an episode to let us know exactly where he is with the whole gazillion dollar fundraising effort.

Netflix Screenplay Reading

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Back in the 80s, Sanders was taped reading "Do not go gentle into that good night" by Dylan Thomas at a small poetry reading. The only thing that could possibly be better is if Sanders taped an episode where he did a one-man reading of Orange Is The New Black Season One.

Sing-A-Long With Sanders

Sanders had an episode on the original Bernie Speaks where it showed his recording of his folk album (folk album!!). This calls for nothing short of a sing-a-long episode where Sanders sings classic folk and revolution songs. The lyrics would appear at the bottom of the screen and a bouncing Bernie head would let us know when to sing the words. What could be better?