When many American Horror Story devotees (like myself) were children, they were being terrified by plant monsters, ventriloquist dummies, and even evil cameras on Goosebumps. Sure, we grew up and realized that real, grown-up horror (and the real world! Fun!) was way scarier than anything on the R.L. Stine TV series, but that doesn't stop Goosebumps from being loads of cheesy '90s fun. And thanks to this brilliant thing called Netflix, we're able to relive all of that via our Instant Queue. Netflix is currently streaming the first season of the series for your enjoyment. Here are five episodes you should definitely re-watch.
"Say Cheese and Die"
Thank God we've moved into the digital age, because Polaroid cameras are actually terrifying. In this one, a young Ryan Gosling (A YOUNG RYAN GOSLING!) plays a kid named Greg who just wants to take cool photos with his (gigantic) new camera. Unfortunately, the camera is both outdated AND evil. No wonder terrible things start happening.
"Piano Lessons Can Be Murder"
remember when your parents forced you into rewarding activities like tennis,
ballet, and piano lessons? And remember how this episode made you beg your parents to stop forcing you? After all, it focuses on a teacher who wants to STEAL HIS STUDENT'S HANDS. Goosebumps was
basically just a kid's version of Criminal Minds.
"The Return of the Mummy"
"Stay Out of the Basement"
In this particularly strange episode, two kids are shocked when they learn that their dad isn't actually their dad. He's actually a plant impersonating their dad. Because, of course. He also bleeds green and eats plant food. (In a horror series where blood is a no-no, you gotta creep the kids out somehow.) This episode convinced a ton of anxious kids that their parents were really plant people. And scared them away from wheat grass juice for life.
"Night of the Living Dummy"
Chucky has nothing
on the creepiness that was Slappy, the talking and terrifying
ventriloquist dummy. He was so scary that he dominated three separate
Goosebumps episodes. Currently streaming on Netflix is the
second "Night of the Living Dummy" episode, in which a young girl is
blamed for Slappy's shenanigans (and by shenanigans, we mean
shenanigans like slapping her Dad across the face and trashing her
room). Did your Tickle-Me-Elmo ever do that?).