As the temperatures chill here in the Northern Hemisphere, there's one thing that will help keep me warm on these cold, long nights — awards season! That's right — it's the time of year where celebrities dress up and we give little golden statues to certain ones. First up on the docket for the winter season is the Golden Globes, but when are the Golden Globes coming to your screen? That would be Jan. 10, which should make the post-holidays time a little brighter.
It's also a longtime tradition to air then. Judged by the Hollywood Foreign Press, the Golden Globe Awards began as a informal ceremony in 1944, with stars like Jennifer Jones and Paul Lukas among the winners that first ceremony. In 1973 the show moved to January where it's stayed ever since. Today, the Golden Globes are one of the few award shows that combine TV and movies, or as Amy Poehler put it when she and Tina Fey hosted a few years ago, the "beautiful people of film mix with the rat-faced people of television." Speaking of hosts, Ricky Gervais is helming this year's show yet again.
There's always some controversy over who gets a nomination (and, more importantly, who doesn't), so in the spirit of the Golden Globes, I've made a list of my dream (television, because I love TV more than I love most people I know) nominations for the show.
Best Furs In A Television Show, Drama—Cookie Lyon, Empire
Is this a question? Step aside, Game Of Thrones — no one cares what Jon Snow is wearing. It’s all about the Cookie, and I want to take a bite out of her wardrobe. The colors! The heels! The opulent furs! (For my sake, I’m insistent that it’s all faux. It is, right? Please?) Cookie wouldn’t be the baddest b in the biz if she weren’t backed up by her stylist (who could be, but is probably not, Portia). She serves up Dynasty-level realness but elevates it so it’s not tacky or overdrawn — it’s perfectly too much. Cookie ain’t playing with Lyon Dynasty, and she certainly ain’t playing when it comes to her clothes.
Most Anticlimactic Sendoff In A Television Show, Drama — Amanda Clarke, Revenge
Did anyone even know that this show was still on the air? After four seasons of crazy Hamptons drama (two of which were actually very good), Revenge called it quits, and Amanda, bolstered by the realization that her father was (spoiler alert) alive, got revenge on Victoria Grayson in the series finale. And then she had to go and marry the weeniest of all of the weeniest, Jack. All that money, promise, and badass martial art skill was all for naught. You’ll never need to know how to diffuse a bomb or hack a mainframe in Montauk, Amanda. I’ll tell you that right now.
Best Show The Networks Should Have Never Cancelled, Comedy Or Musical—The Mindy Project
The show had a core fan base, great writing, dance moves by Chris Messina, and many colorful outfits for Mindy Lahiri. That always sounded like a smash hit to me. Luckily for fans, the show is doing well on Hulu, who jumped on production as soon as FOX cancelled it.
Most Uncomfortable Sitting Position In A Television Show, Drama—Don Draper, Mad Men
How was Don so deep in meditation in the Mad Men series finale? I can barely cross my legs due to my inflexibility (I blame genetics and marathoning television shows), so I can barely wrap my mind around the fact that Jon Hamm probably sat cross-legged in the grass for hours. He deserves a Golden Globe for his flexibility and ability to look cool while sitting at an ashram.
Those are my suggestions — I’ll sit and wait for the Hollywood Foreign Press Association to take note.
Images: Giphy (4)