As valiant an effort as it was, the Jax-orchestrated mayhem/sorcery that rounded out last week’s episode of Vanderpump Rules did not actually throw a wrench in James and Lala’s budding romance (however, the same cannot be said about the bite marks that materialized on James’s arm halfway through this week’s episode). You know what else remained wrench-less? James and Lala's budding musical partnership. Yes, James was serious about making music together. So serious, that at the top of Monday night’s installment of Pump Rules, James and his recording equipment dropped by Lala's apartment. And then, the pair recorded a song together.
Real talk: I don't have anything to say about the song because the entire scene was sort of a blur. Because that was the scene that James decided to reveal something major in a talking head. As the makeout buddies sang and rapped and canoodled, James told the viewers at home that he was born into music. And then, he blindsided the viewers at home with not one, not two, but three bombshells:
- James’s dad managed Wham!
- James’s dad is George Michael’s cousin.
- George Michael is James’s godfather.
I... WHAT?! All of that is so huge. How did he manage to go all of last season without mentioning any of these things?
I mean, I gotta hand it to James: If George Michael was my godfather AND second cousin (wait, can someone check my family tree math?), I would shamelessly try to shoehorn that piece of information into every conversation ever.
I'm pretty sure I wouldn't he able to help myself and I would make it my life's mission to ensure that every person I ever spoke to knew that the man who sings iconic pieces of art like "Father Figure" and "Careless Whisper" and "Freedom '90" was my godfather AND relative. I guess when it comes to mega-famous godparents/relatives, James just has more tact than I do. Good on him.
Image: Andrew Eccles/Bravo