You’ve been to high school (I’m assuming), so you know the drill. With the end of the school year comes end of the year activities, like yearbook distribution. And in those distributed yearbooks are the hallowed class superlatives. But, now that high school is behind us, we have to bring that archaic popularity contest to validate our lives in someway, now don’t we? Of course we do. So, let’s hash out the TV show superlatives for 2015. If you find superlatives to be problematic, think of it this way: At least this time it’s for fun, and there won’t be any theater kids fighting in the lunchroom over who was voted, “Most Likely to Be Famous.”
Besides, I think the TV superlatives for 2015 are a great way of getting our likes and dislikes out there into the ether. Sure, we can complain and praise on Twitter and Tumblr and whatnot, but this is a much more concise and clear cut representation of what we want. And by we, I mean me. Because this post is a dictatorship, not a democracy. But I promise I speak for the people. Well, kind of. Just… work with me here. I think you’ll actually agree.
Here are the 2015 end of year TV show superlatives.
Worst "Fitz" On TV
Why? Because he doesn't know what he wants, and he's an adult human who RUNS THE FREE WORLD.
Most Tragic Death
Beth Greene, The Walking Dead.
The Walking Dead pulled a Kanye West upstaging Taylor Swift at the VMAs here. And, by that I mean, as Katy Perry so eloquently (and ironically) put it, "...IT"S LIKE YOU STEPPED ON A KITTEN."
Most Tragic "Death"
Jon Snow, Game of Thrones.
So, we're pretty sure he's alive at this point, right? Whatever. This accolade is about the sting we felt when we saw him bleed out into the pure, white snow. It was one of the most evil things GOT has ever done. And that's saying something.
Character Most Likely To Deliver A Pizza On Time
Barry Allen, The Flash.
Fast and reliable. Everything I need in a pizza delivery man.
Cast Of Characters Most Likely To Be Imprisoned Without The Possibility Of Parole
Because I think pretty much all of them have committed at least one, if not two, major felonies. And I'm not just talking the convicted Chanels.
Most Evil (But Also Most Impossibly Well Dressed)
Lucious Lyon, Empire.
How can someone so bad look so good?
Most Tattoos On A Character Per Square Inch
Jane Doe, Blindspot.
The girl deserves something for all that time and pain she put it. I mean, other than the fact that it looks super cool.
Late-Night Host Most Likely To Be Your Best Friend
Jimmy Fallon, The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon.
He's just so personable and silly. Also, he seems like a great hugger.
Most Well-Behaved Baby During Apocalyptic Times
Judith, The Walking Dead.
Poor Judith. This baby hasn't had one damn day to go to Gymboree, but you don't see her complaining.
Best Group Halloween Costume
The Johnsons as The Obamas, Black-ish.
So perfectly executed. But I think Andre Jr. as a Secret Service agent and Jack as Bo Obama really made the whole thing come together.
On-Screen Couple Most Likely To Make Even The Iciest Heart Thaw
Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak (Olicity), Arrow.
JUST LOOK AT THEM! But, really, is there anything cuter than the stoic Green Arrow turning into a pile of mush for a genius blabber mouth? Probably not.
Show We Were Most Sad To See Go
Parks and Recreation ( ...come back).
I miss the jokes. I miss the waffles. I miss Pawnee.
Girl Most Likely To Be Super (Awkward)
Kara Danvers, Supergirl.
Because she's literally super while also being also super awkward at the same damn time.
Show That's Most Likely To Never Die, Even Though Everyone On The Show Does
You know nothing is scared when they kill Derek Shepherd and then are renewed for another season.
Most Unlikely But Surprisingly Wonderful Alliance
Big Boo & Pennsatucky, Orange Is The New Black.
Despite being so different, they both had complementary things to bring to the table.
Character Everyone Is Least Likely To Mess With If Encountered IRL
Annalise Keating, How To Get Away With Murder.
Excuse me while I back away slowly, change my name, and move to Canada.
Show You're Most Likely To Cover Your Eyes During And Watch Intermittently Through Your Fingers
American Horror Story: Hotel.
Have you seen an episode? It's terrifying, man!
Winners, go home and tell your mom. She's going to be so proud.