This Swear Word Coloring Book Will Fix Everything

I'd been hanging cautiously on the sidelines of this whole ~color yourself calm~ movement that's cropped up with coloring books for adults in 2015. But now? Tag me in, Coach. There is a swear word coloring book, and so I am officially on board. This ingenious mashup up of the beautiful and crass comes by way of Etsy artist Sarah Bigwood, whose "Sweary Coloring Book" might be the cheapest and most effective form of therapy I've ever laid eyes on. Each image features a choice four-(or more)-letter word in bold and beautiful script, surrounded by an array of soothing flower designs. Now you can have your revenge and color it, too.

I think this is especially necessary for people like me, who want to color themselves calm, but aren't necessarily baseline calm enough to try. For instance, some asswipe honked at me and tried to mow me down in a sidewalk when I had the walk signal the other day. My first reaction? Well, flip him off through my Hello Kitty gloves and yell some choice things in the street (duh). My second reaction? ... Probably not to sit down with a fresh set of colored pencils and scribble the pain away on a nice floral pattern. That is, unless the floral pattern bore the very same sentiments I screamed at that terrible driver, who now may or may not be living in fear of my unrepentant hostility in some dark corner of Manhattan. Hooray for swear word coloring books!

The book is in presale right now, and features 20 pages of this kind of magic:

For When Your First Date Takes The Last Tater Tot

Otherwise known as the last date. CHECK!

For When Steve Harvey Names You Miss Universe, And A Minute Later Names You The Runner-Up

The sauce is so awkward.

For Anyone In Your Life Who Buys A Copy Of This Without Buying You One, Too


There are a myriad of other hilarious and horrible designs to choose from, and they can all be yours in January 2016. Preorder your own copy here.

Images: Etsy; Pixabay